Thank you for doing this one! I’ve been doing the dishwasher regularly for quite a few months now and my oldest kid has started getting in the habit of putting her dishes in during the day (though she still asks first whether it’s clean). However, I SO do not have any other routines solidly in place even for myself at this point – and this is causing a problem I need to vent/ask for advice on. I have a normal friend who comes over fairly often (yes, I let her in even though I don’t have my house under control) and says she doesn’t judge – yet she frequently makes remarks about my family not contributing to keeping the house tidy and asks why I don’t make the kids (and husband) put away their stuff and help clean the house. It’s starting to make me NUTS! See, everything you say about needing to have a routine and system before I bring the rest of my family in makes complete sense to me and I am bringing them in slowly to things I know I can keep us consistent with, but it’s slooow because that’s my reality. She asks why I don’t require them to put their stuff away so the living room won’t be so messy – my thought is “I’ve never consistently had any of us put everything away, so they probably don’t fully understand this isn’t how the room is supposed to look” – but I can’t make her understand that. Any advice? Should I try having her listen to this episode?
On another side, since she thinks I should already have this down (like a normal person), I can’t always celebrate my small victories because they don’t make sense to her. So would you be excited for me about this: I started something new this summer – each kid has a list when they get up of things they need to do before they can get on electronics. I included at least one household chore for each of them – sweep a specific part of the house, help empty the dishwasher, put away XYZ. They weren’t big jobs (despite what the kids sometimes claim), but I was AMAZED at the difference it made in the house – so much so that I was able to have a conversation with my 8-year-old daughter about what a difference her contributions were making to the household, which made her (sometimes) more motivated to help. I was really excited about this and hope to restart it next week (we’ve all been gone with camps and trips this week). I know it’s not huge, but to me it felt like progress and a positive step in the right direction.
Thanks again for all your support – you’re making me feel like this is mission possible (and I got a bunch done this morning while catching up on your podcasts, so my house will be nicer when I come home next week).
I am SO excited about your new summer routine with your kids! That is awesome and it IS huge! You’re doing great going about this in small steps and making real progress. I’m so sorry your friend doesn’t understand.
Thanks Dana – I knew you’d understand – you so get me :)! Thanks again for doing the podcasts – they really help me clean and declutter – partly because I only allow myself to listen to them when I’m doing those activities 😉 and partly because hearing you talk about it makes me want to do it :). Have a great summer with your kids – when you come back I’ll let you know whether we managed to keep doing the morning list or got detailed by all the days away from home ??.
P. S. I will of course buy your book when it comes out – since I already own your ebooks and I have to support your speaking my language about cleaning and organizing ;). You’ll let us know if there’s a pre-order option, right?
I ordered the ebook and wondered when I will receive it? I’m addicted to your podcasts and literature. It’s making a huge difference in my home! Thanks!
Thank you for doing this one! I’ve been doing the dishwasher regularly for quite a few months now and my oldest kid has started getting in the habit of putting her dishes in during the day (though she still asks first whether it’s clean). However, I SO do not have any other routines solidly in place even for myself at this point – and this is causing a problem I need to vent/ask for advice on. I have a normal friend who comes over fairly often (yes, I let her in even though I don’t have my house under control) and says she doesn’t judge – yet she frequently makes remarks about my family not contributing to keeping the house tidy and asks why I don’t make the kids (and husband) put away their stuff and help clean the house. It’s starting to make me NUTS! See, everything you say about needing to have a routine and system before I bring the rest of my family in makes complete sense to me and I am bringing them in slowly to things I know I can keep us consistent with, but it’s slooow because that’s my reality. She asks why I don’t require them to put their stuff away so the living room won’t be so messy – my thought is “I’ve never consistently had any of us put everything away, so they probably don’t fully understand this isn’t how the room is supposed to look” – but I can’t make her understand that. Any advice? Should I try having her listen to this episode?
On another side, since she thinks I should already have this down (like a normal person), I can’t always celebrate my small victories because they don’t make sense to her. So would you be excited for me about this: I started something new this summer – each kid has a list when they get up of things they need to do before they can get on electronics. I included at least one household chore for each of them – sweep a specific part of the house, help empty the dishwasher, put away XYZ. They weren’t big jobs (despite what the kids sometimes claim), but I was AMAZED at the difference it made in the house – so much so that I was able to have a conversation with my 8-year-old daughter about what a difference her contributions were making to the household, which made her (sometimes) more motivated to help. I was really excited about this and hope to restart it next week (we’ve all been gone with camps and trips this week). I know it’s not huge, but to me it felt like progress and a positive step in the right direction.
Thanks again for all your support – you’re making me feel like this is mission possible (and I got a bunch done this morning while catching up on your podcasts, so my house will be nicer when I come home next week).
I am SO excited about your new summer routine with your kids! That is awesome and it IS huge! You’re doing great going about this in small steps and making real progress. I’m so sorry your friend doesn’t understand.
Thanks Dana – I knew you’d understand – you so get me :)! Thanks again for doing the podcasts – they really help me clean and declutter – partly because I only allow myself to listen to them when I’m doing those activities 😉 and partly because hearing you talk about it makes me want to do it :). Have a great summer with your kids – when you come back I’ll let you know whether we managed to keep doing the morning list or got detailed by all the days away from home ??.
P. S. I will of course buy your book when it comes out – since I already own your ebooks and I have to support your speaking my language about cleaning and organizing ;). You’ll let us know if there’s a pre-order option, right?
I ordered the ebook and wondered when I will receive it? I’m addicted to your podcasts and literature. It’s making a huge difference in my home! Thanks!
You should have gotten it immediately! Email me at [email protected] and I’ll help you figure it out.