Things have been crazy for the last week.
I’m currently directing a play that opens the week after Thanksgiving, and I was in another show yesterday, with three performances in one day.
Neither are/were as huge of a commitment as they could be, but they’re as much as I can handle in this being-a-mama-is-my-number-one-priority phase of life.
I could really just re-run The Wonder Bra Avalanche, which I wrote last spring. This time I would call it the Navy Shoe Avalanche.
I can do fairly well with this deslobification thing as long as life is “normal.” But when I hit these periods, which do and always will come, and which, honestly, I love . . . things fall apart.
I have so much on my mind that I become consumed with all the things that must be accomplished . . . and house-related details like mopping or toilet-cleaning never cross my mind.
I also get clumsier when I’m in a hurry. I knock over a plant. I’m in a hurry, so I can’t be bothered to clean up the mess right then. By the time I come home again, I have more to think about and so I can’t be bothered to clean up the mess then either.
If I wait until the last minute to pull out my navy blue character shoes, the fact that there is only one in the spot where I was sure they both were, means that I end up pulling everything out of that cabinet, dumping it on the floor, and leaving it there because I’m in a hurry and need to spend three minutes searching in one more place for the shoe . . . instead of three minutes putting the stuff back.
But . . .
This is how it’s going to be. I love to do theatre. I’m not a pro, but it feeds my soul and I need to have a little of it in my life every once in a while.
When I get close to a performance, I get tunnel vision.
When I get tunnel vision, my house is going to suffer.
Honestly . . . I’m okay with that.
I’m just not okay with letting that make me feel like there’s no point in ever trying to do better once things get back to “normal.”
Like I used to do.
In the past on the blog, I’ve lamented my ability to keep the house under control during these crazy times.
This time, I’m looking at it differently. Knowing that I have new skills and habits in place to help me survive these periods, and to get me back on track when it’s over . . . allows me to fully enjoy these crazy times.
Make sense?
Okaysowrite says
This absolutely makes sense and I’m not sure why no one commented regarding identifying with this until me, 3ish years later. You NEED “you time” apart from being Wife, Mom, and Domestic Engineer. You need “you time” to be a better wife and mom. (So that you can always bring your best self no matter what hat your wearing and so that that no-fun whining martyr mom who we all have inside us doesn’t rear her ugly head!) I also get that you (and I) NEED to cut yourself some slack. On rare occasions the “self” puzzle piece ends up being a tad bigger than the domestic engineer, the wife and (gasp!) even the mom piece. It’s OK. The house will survive and (I’m sure) be waiting for you when your back to the routine. Your hubs will be just fine and even your kiddos will make it. It may even give them a different sort of respect and appreciation for the doting mother that you are! (and I am. I’m not an actress, but I do love to play volleyball and I’m saying these things to you as well as to myself.) Play on, Girl. PLAY ON!! 😀
Heather says
I love this post. Having your routines in place allows you to be unafraid of jumping into your plays and “tunnel-vision” projects. You’ve done the routines long enough that you trust them, and trust yourself to get back to them. Good for you!