It’s another Snow Day.
Last week, that sent the house into chaos. (See how good I am at blaming the weather instead of myself?)
But today has been different. I’ve consciously done my daily checklist.
The goal of the daily checklist is to establish habits. And it has established many. It actually feels “normal” to me to have a kitchen that’s usable. Not piled in dishes and requiring the pushing around/balancing of pots and pans . . . in order to make supper . . . on any given day.
But, even though I still hold on to the dream that eventually my house will stay in order without me ever realizing that I’ve had to work at it, I know that is just a dream.
No matter how much better I get at this housekeeping thing, it will always be work.
And I’ll always struggle with my Slob Vision. While keeping the kitchen clean is, in my opinion, the thing that makes or breaks the house, more than that needs to be done. Which is why I created the Daily Checklist.
But, as seems to happen with me, I’ve been letting some things slide.
I can’t afford to do that.
If I don’t consciously take 5 minutes to pick up the house every day, clutter magically begins to spread over all of its flat surfaces. If I don’t consciously check the bathrooms for towels and undies on the floor, I can walk right over them and never notice . . . for weeks.
Last week, after we had our Family Cleaning Day to recover from Snow Week, my husband remarked that “It just feels like we’re in control again.”
He said this not once, but twice.
He’s so right. When I ignore the Daily Checklist, the house slips out of my control.
And then, Carlyn commented yesterday that it would be nice if I shared my daily checklist every day the way I used to. I quit doing that a while back, because I was afraid that it got monotonous for my readers.
Not to be selfish here, but I have to be selfish.
I need the daily accountability of writing that post. So, though I’m not saying Imgonna (since that rarely works for me), I’m warning you that I may be posting my daily checklists again more often. In addition to my highly-hilarious, tear-jerking, thought-provoking, screen-riveting posts, of course.
I had already decided this, and then Julie commented today on this very old post where I was talking about how frustrated I was with myself for rationalizing away some very important daily tasks.
Mmmm hmmmm. I’m thinking I need to re-focus.
This is a process. But it’s not one that will ever be over. Unless I make it really big, and can hire full-time help to pick up after me, I’m going to have to keep up this daily checklist thing for the rest of my life.
(And I totally would hire full-time help.)
So here goes, my daily checklist for a completely-reasonable-to-sit-on-the-couch-and-let-the-clutter-pile-up-kind-of-day:
Made bed.
Emptied dishwasher.
Cleaned kitchen after hubby made pancakes.
Wiped down kitchen.
Swept kitchen.
Checked bathrooms for clutter (and found some).
Did a five-minute pick-up. (Oh. My. Goodness. Five minute pick-ups make such an incredible difference. It’s almost unreal.)
Lounged on my made-bed and read for a while.
Snuggled on the couch and had popcorn, nachos, and hot chocolate (for the kids, decaf coffee for me since I’m allergic to chocolate).
And the house feels good. And we feel in control. Even on a Snow Day.
Aaaaahhhhh.
********
Two additional things:
First, for those of you reading backwards, let me just say that I LOVE comments on very old posts. Seriously. It’s like when someone compliments your child who isn’t out front getting the attention, but is sitting so well in the audience, and you’re tickled pink that someone appreciates him/her.
Second, if it would help you, please feel free to share the things you’ve checked off of your daily checklist in the comments. Every day if you need to. There’s something about writing it down that helps. You can comment as anonymous, or type your name where it says “name/url.” You don’t have to have a website to put something there.
_____________________________
Anna says
I need to start doing this too. Makes you feel accountable. Oh and not to mention, PROUD of yourself for accomplishing so much!
Rebekah from Simply Rebekah says
TOTALLY unrelated, but if I was allergic to chocolate I would be about 15 pounds lighter. Just sayin'.
Karissa says
LOL I totally agree with Rebekah!! So TRUE!
Great post Nony! As always I LOVE LOVE LOVE this blog! Great job!
Nony the Slob says
OK, here's my speech on the chocolate thing. I didn't develop an allergy until I was about 19, and before that I ate my fair share. My mother was allergic, and I always said that if I was allergic, I'd lose so much weight.
However, I am most definitely not thinner than I was at 19, nor have I been thinner than I was at 19, since I was 19.
My point, and my gift to you, is the "proof" that I can offer that it is not the chocolate that is the problem. So, go eat all the chocolate you want!
Karen@Candid Diversions says
I cannot imagine living with a chocolate allergy. I say I cannot function without a piece of dark chocolate every day and I'm only slightly exaggerating.
Love these posts about making yourself conscious of what needs to be done. I have to do that to myself and it's nice to know I'm not alone.
BusyMommy says
I can totally relate. Last week was chaos at my house too. Couldn't get motivated for those snow days. Just wanted to lay around in my pj's all day, and that's what I pretty much did. Then Friday came and I was like, I can't believe I haven't done anything the whole time the kids have been home. So today, it was a whole other story. We did sleep in, but aside from that, I kept to a pretty routine schedule (for myself anyway, I still let the kids just hang out…a little). I felt so much better knowing that I did my workout (so proud of myself for that cuz I'm always looking for an excuse out of that one), took a shower, CHANGED my clothes, cleaned the kitchen, did tons of laundry, cooked meals, etc…(you get the picture). It feels so good not to have wasted the day!!! 🙂 However, I have decided that if we get a snow day tomorrow (which is highly unlikely cuz it's supposed to clear up) I'm gonna stay in my pj's and watch videos all day!! 🙂
crystal says
I have an aunt coming to visit for the first time and I am trying to do a spring clean, but I can't find my checklist! So not only am I not capable of sticking to it, I can't even find it!!! Is there hope for me?!
Nony the Slob says
Of course there's hope! I totally understand the frustration of not being able to find the list. Been there many times!
Tara Gunn says
All these years, I thought I was the only person in the world who struggled in this area. I stumbled across your blog just this morning and I felt a renewing in my soul. I was not taught to clean house growing up and never had the house cleaning fairies follow me. I have used checklist for myself and was embrassed by them. I need a new list, accountability is awesome.
I am a homeschool mom, and each of my 3 younger children do daily chores and this helps, the house run smooth. But my bedroom and bathroom is horrible. Thank you dear woman for being transparent, and offering hope to those challenged by household chores. Through much prayer it is nothing like it was 10 years ago, ut there are some women I don't want coming over.
Nony the Slob says
Welcome, Tara! I can promise you are not the only one who struggles! I thought I was the only one before I started this blog. Thanks for your comment. It always helps me to know that there are more of "us" out there.
Carolyn says
Well if you say you like comments on old post I will go ahead. 🙂 I was going to wait till I finished reading your entire blog. Love it! While I don’t have quite as much difficulty wiTh clutter, I do lack motivation on cleaning bathrooms, mopping and dusting. I have been reading your blog and it motivates me to occasionally put down my iPad and go actually do a 5 min task. Thank you!
Nony says
Thanks, Carolyn! I do love comments on older posts. Comments like these motivate ME to keep going!
Rebeccca says
Glad you don’t mind comments on older posts… I’m reading your blog backwards (well….actually it’s frontwards but whatever.) and love seeing the progress you’ve made. My favorite thing so far? All housekeeping points expire at midnight… That’s the one I needed!
Laura says
I’ve been reading through your posts in order for the past week or so (as I get a moment here and there). Like a previous poster, I was going to wait until I was finished to comment, but I felt compelled to on this post.
I can totally, 100% relate to being a slob. To leaving piles of stuff sitting around or in laundry baskets and just not seeing it. To going several days without cleaning the kitchen or washing dishes. To having diapers pile up on my bathroom counter (yes, really) because I didn’t take out the totally full garbage bag of diapers from my Diaper Champ.
Slowly and surely, I’ve been doing better. I’ve been using a book by Stephanie O’Dea called the Totally Together Journal that has been an absolute lifesaver. She has a “Daily 7” similar to your checklist:
— make beds right away
— do one complete load of laundry
— empty all garbage cans
— keep your kitchen sink empty
— clean up after yourself and help children do the same
— bathroom wipe-down
— ten-minute cleanup before bed
I’ve realized that even if I *only* do the Daily 7 (or even 4-5 of them) each day, that’s still enough to keep my house presentable. If I have time to do the weekly cleaning tasks, then awesome. If I have time to get the semi-regular tasks each week taken care of, then it’s cause for celebration.
My house has looked SO much better over the past three months, but it has been work. It will *always* be work. I must consciously force myself to do things like clean up the kitchen after dinner and put my clean clothes away before going to bed. But I’m sticking with it because the house is a lot more peaceful and I just feel a lot better when I do these little things.
Anyway, I’ve written a book already, so I’ll just close by saying thank you for being honest and real with your readers! I’m looking forward to reading even more. 🙂
shirley says
this may sound weird, but i’ve been wanting to share with you for a couple of weeks now a “tool” that has really been helpful to me. it’s a simple spiral notebook and a BIG pack of LITTLE post it notes (1 1/2″ x 2″). you can set it up however it works best for you. over christmas, i had a page for each day (labeled at the top w/a post it). then i wrote down the things i needed to get done on a given day onto more post its. one job per post it. it’s kind of like a to do list, only you pull off the post its when the task is complete. for me, a to do list gets VERY messy looking the more you get done. with this “system” as you are getting things done, your page is getting cleaner and cleaner! i’m very visual. for my daily tasks, i just stick them onto the next day’s page when they’re completed. weekly tasks go onto the page for the day i’ve assigned them. hope that makes sense!
the only time i actually wrote ON the page was to make my lists of daily tasks and weekly tasks, and my goals for the coming year.
also, over christmas, i kept a few pages at the back with each family member’s names and gifts purchased or gift ideas. you can really use this to help you keep ANYTHING organized!!! i have 3 pages full of post its of clutter areas that need to be worked on and another 2 pages full of projects i need/want to do around here. i’m a crafty sort.
for the new year, i’ve set it up with 2 weeks worth of pages (a page a day). no dates, just the day of the week. then i’ll rotate back to the front for the 3rd week. i’m not sure how that’s gonna work just yet… i’ll keep you posted. 😉 thanks for giving me the opportunity to share! i guess this is a “works for me wednesday”! 🙂 okay, it’s after midnight so TECHNICALLY it’s thursday, but for me it doesn’t count as the next day unless i’ve slept in between. and, hey, it’s only 11:30 in texas!
michelle says
I’m so glad I found this blog. It feels more like my own *unwritten* journal. Like you’ve just taken my thoughts, life and home and put it in a blog. I’m proud of you for having the courage to do it because I’m still rather ashamed of myself. But because of you I know I’m not alone and I still have hope. Has anyone heard of The Sidetracked Home Executives(SHEs) – From Pigpen to Paradise. It’s by 2 sisters who pegged themselves The Slob Sisters. Pam Young and Peggy Jones. It was wrote in the 80s. But it has a system in it that a lot of people swear by. It involves index cards and an index card box. Lots of people swear by it. I’ve had the book on my bedside table for over a month now. Guess that’s what I should be doin rather than surfing the net. Lol But love love your blog..Thanks for letting me know I may be a mess but there’s still hope. Ps this is my new hompage…let’s see how this works. Hehehe
Nony says
New homepage? Love it!
I read that book the summer before I started this blog. I skipped the actual “how to” chapter though because I was so overwhelmed!
Gwendolyn says
Well, like some previous posters, I am reading your blog backwards and was going to wait to comment. 🙂 I feel like I am reading about my life as I read your blog…I share SO MANY of the same struggles as you did (maybe you still do….I’m still on last year, lol!) I have tried Flylady and many other systems, and like you, got very excited about how they were going to change my life, etc. My husband never believed me, and I soon failed. I took your words to heart and haven’t mentioned anything to my husband about my new system, and even though I’m not doing much, he’s already commented several times on how nice the house looks!
The most encouraging thing for me is to read your blog and see your struggles…how many times you failed, but picked yourself up and started again. I think that is where all of my many organizing books have failed me…I think that it will somehow be a quick, magic fix if I just do what they say, and when I mess up, I just give up altogether.
I also started a journal just for recording my journey at de-slobifying my home. It really does help motivate me if I know I have to write down that I didn’t do something just because I didn’t feel like it (which is almost daily!)
Thank you for your transparency and honesty about your journey, and thank you for inventing many new words that spell check doesn’t recognize (I happen to also love words…I used to teach a Senior English class before kids…now I just homeschool my own 6 kids!)
Pam says
I’ve been reading backwards and have my own daily checklist that I’ve been using inconsistently for about a month. I made a weekly menu about two months ago by printing the days of the week on pretty paper and then putting it in a frame so I write my menu with dry erase marker on the glass. I did the same sort of thing with the daily checklist. All of my tasks are printed on pretty paper and then I can cross them off with the marker. each night I just wipe it off. So far the bathroom and dishes are the must consistent and its making a huge difference. I also try to tackle clutter hot spots, which its basically any flat surface. even one clean surface feels like a weight has been lifted.
Challice says
I’ve been reading your blog from the beginning after finding it on a series of links on facebook. You have helped me tremendously, I almost always do dishes daily now instead of letting them pile up for a week or more. I cleared off my dining room table and it has STAYED clear (a miracle in itself right there). I’m really glad you are going back to posting daily check lists because I think reading those help me the most, it is not too much repetition(for me any way). Bless you!
Hilary says
Going to start the 5 min pick up with my kids…I think that will be a big help around my house.
Angie W. says
Well, since you said you like comments on old posts…I have been reading your blog for the last few weeks or so starting at the beginning. While I probably don’t qualify as a slob, I don’t quite qualify as normal either. I used to be normal before I had small children but they quickly destroyed any previous working method for me and I stopped trying so hard. Definitely relate to being overwhelmed. Now that I’m not pregnant, not struggling with post-partum depression, and getting to sleep thru the night, it is TIME to get back in control of my house. Thanks to the motivation from your story, I’ve been making my bed, cleaning my kitchen up before bed and doing a lot more dealing with things right now instead of putting them off for the perfect moment. My husband has commented on the nice effect of things I thought he didn’t notice or thought were silly like decorative pillows on our bed. Who knew?! Thank you for having the courage to find your own way and realize why systems didn’t work for you. I have tried method after method of keeping your house in order only to abandon them when I was overwhelmed or they didn’t fit our schedule. A new task at a time until it feels routine–now that I can do. Especially since I pick the tasks that matter to us. You are inspiring to me and you’ve also helped me understand how some of my friends’ brains work.
sonja says
I am also reading from the beginning and working my way forward. Just LOVING this. It’s so funny, it’s so honest, and it is SO helpful.
While I am more of a “normal” person, I am currently struggling with auto-immune issues. I find it difficult to do things now that I never would have even given a second thought to. Which makes it very easy to feel like a failure.
After reading your blog, I stopped making myself “to-do” lists and then beating myself up every night when I couldn’t get everything done….instead, I started making a list each day of what I was actually able to get done. And writing, “Yay me!” on it. It has helped me feel like I am not just a useless slug now. AND, I am also giving myself permission to do “just a little bit” of something, instead of feeling like a flop if I can’t do it all at once.
Thank you Nony!!!
Krystal D says
and here I was worried about posting a comment on here each time I read something that struck a chord with me (which is quite often). I have been reading your blog backwards for about two months now and have felt each entry was written by me about me. I am a slob and I need help taking the slob goggles off. Reading your blog is helping me do that. I have started cleaning my kitchen each night (not just occasionally but actually nightly) and that has changed so much already for me. The house just looks cleaner with a clean kitchen. Thank you so much for your blog and being so honest.
Shirls says
Hey Nony look how far I’ve come! Only another thirteen months and I’ll be up to date on your blog. What I really admire is your commitment to writing every day. Even when you must be exhausted. You have no idea how much you have spurred me on to do things. I had a look at A Bowlful of lemons and while I love it it is sort of intimidating too. Had to come running back here to feel better!
Erica says
So, I’m on the wayback machine since I’m reading from the start. I was planning on commenting even without that comment at the bottom of your post. 😀
I really like reading the daily checklists, and even reading through a month of your posts in a sitting it doesn’t get monotonous. It helps reinforce the fact that keeping a clean(er) house requires conscious effort every single day. And THAT is where my biggest blindspot has always been.
I tackled the master bedroom AGAIN today, and I think that all of the previous times I tackled it have really paid off. It looked like it threw up on itself, but as I was putting away clean laundry and making the dirty laundry pile I was also putting stuff with value in a hamper and other stuff in the trash. Or throwing stuff with value on my existing pile. I am FINALLY installing the shelves in the basement this week, so the stuff against the wall will finally be relocated or tossed. Because I_can’t_live_like_this_anymore. I was so bummed that I only had one trash bag – not even full! – coming out of the room, though I did overfill the donations bag (which was full to start with) and filled the rag bag. It looks much, much better though.
Reading through your blog is really inspiring me, and will hopefully be the motivation I need to keep up with my daily tasks on a daily basis. So I hope you decided to keep posting the daily checklist, since reading two years and four months of daily checklists will really help reinforce the fact that each day we need to make the decision to “come clean.”
Thanks Nony. And thanks for the recipe ideas. I actually made and froze 10 pounds of taco meat and I am just loving how easy it makes things.
Camille says
Old Post!! Thanks for the heads-up that you enjoy new comments on old posts! I found your blog a couple of months ago and have been addicted… but it’s taking me ages to get through it! I’ll kick back and spend 2-3 hours a night reading if I can! I’m a bit of a neat freak (in my head… not so much in reality), but I relate to you in SO MANY ways! It’s uncanny. In fact, I’ve called “those other people” “normal” for years! I just have to say that I belly laugh every time I look at the pics of you. Every time. And I’ve been reading your blog for like 2 months. Thanks for the motivation… for me and for all the friends I’ve told to go read your blog!
Dana White says
Thank YOU for telling people! And yes, I DO love comments on old posts!
Magda says
Thank you for your whole blog! I read it at night to get in a good mindset for the morning. Yesterday we got back from a trip, and after the laundry and unpacking, I went ahead and cleared off the dining room table (clutter included a telescope…) and planned a dinner (frozen pizza counts, right?) and we ate dinner at the dining room table as a family with no guests–first time, I think, since we moved here a year ago. I even excavated the clutter so we could get to the table–and cleaned up afterwards! Husband was happy to bathe the kidlets so I could get ahead on laundry. Thank you again for sharing your struggle and giving strength to others.
Debbie says
My oldest son always tells people he’s allergic to chocolate instead of the truth that he actually hates it. (When he was in daycare 20 years ago, he thought someone was giving him a Skittle but it was actually an M&M, and he’s had an aversion to chocolate ever since, and it was fun trying to make a Lion King cake without chocolate frosting for the mane when he was 3!)
The only thing I’m doing consistently every day is making my bed (because it only takes a minute). Anything else I get done is just gravy. I know other things don’t technically take very long (but I’m like your friend who estimated 10 minutes to put on an apron) so I get overwhelmed and don’t even try.
Melissa says
I love your blog. It’s great to get the “please comment” on old posts because this is where I’m up to. I’m working on my study de-slob-ification process at the moment (for the third time in 5 years – sigh) – “If I have cleared this chair, then it’s OK to put this plastic container of unsorted clothes on top of it, just until I get it sorted, right?”
I’ve started my own Daily Checklist but so far there are just three things on it:
1. Wipe bathroom counters
2. 15 minutes decluttering study (this will change to another room once the study is done)
3. Kids’ checklists – we do these at dinnertime, because we are all sitting together at the table. Like you, if I don’t have a specific time to do it, then I forget.
Anonymous says
I cannot begin to tell you the impact your blog has had on my life since I found it a few weeks ago. You have helped me completely change my mindset about cleaning – it’s like you know where I am coming from. I am a mom to 5 and my house was always awful. My kids couldn’t invite their friends over, I was hesitant to let people in the house, my husband was always saying “if we could just get the house clean, then we can (remodel, have people over, fill in the blank).” And the house would get clean, and then within a day or two it would get dirty again.
Now thanks to you, I am realizing that maintaining order in my home is an ongoing process. This is a big step for me. I am learning that although I hate doing dishes, they are significantly less annoying if I take 30 seconds and wash them immediately instead of waiting and waiting until they become an overwhelming and disgusting chore. Also, as a mom to a baby, my son is much happier when I work on the dishes throughout the day instead of taking an hour or more at night.
You have helped me to understand myself in a new enlightened way. After years of trying Flylady repeatedly only to get frustrated and feel like I wasn’t doing it well enough, I now feel like I might be able to handle this after all. You have given my family new hope. Even my husband has been heartily recommending you after seeing the change in our house in just a few weeks. It is a work in progress, but it is steadily getting better. Thank you for everything! You are an inspiration to me.
Dana White says
Oh thank you so much for this comment!
Sarah says
Oh Nony! I love your books and your posts! The daily checklist is the best, in fact I wouldn’t let myself read your blog today until I finished mine….and would you believe it I went to my bedroom five times to fold the clean clothes and got distracted. I had to “forcibly” keep myself folding as I kept seeing other things to put away! Hubby said the house looked nice when he got home 🙂
Rebecca says
I have commented a few times on old posts already and I’m glad you like getting them. I just have to say a big THANK YOU for sharing your daily struggles. I can relate to most of what you say and really has helped me figure my own self out.
Theresa says
I just wanted to say thanks again! I’m so excited to see how much you’ve helped me since I’ve started reading. I’ve started telling others to read your blog…. A lady from church, my mom, my sister. I can’t wait to see where you and your blog take us 🙂 I pray God will bless you in this ministry!
Sonja B says
I have been reading your blog backwards for several weeks. I’m so glad to know that I am not alone! Most of the people who houses I visit are so much neater than mine, and only a small few are anything like mine. I always assumed that there were no slobs any more, just super Moms who can do it all, perfect, the first time. Anyway, I’m preparing for yet another yard sale, and you have inspired me so that each night I am decluttering and adding to the yard sale pile in addition to cleaning some area of my home (so many problem areas to choose from!) Hubs has started noticing and helping me too, he’s helping with the dishes each night. And that clean sink alone has made a huge difference, just like you and the Fly Lady said that it would! 🙂
Jeanine says
I have been doing most of the things on my daily checklist for the last three weeks. 🙂 We had weekend company and completely exhausted ourselves doing the “clean and stash”, but I did clean some areas that hadn’t been cleaned in, well, in a LONG time. Normally after such a huge effort I allow myself a few days off for recuperation. But not this time. Even though I’m very busy this week, and I still ache from the big cleaning work, I did my daily checklist. AND even though the kitchen sink backed up today and that would have been a perfect excuse to do nothing in the kitchen, I decided it really wasn’t an excuse to not put away groceries, or wipe off the counters, or sweep the floor.
Danielle says
I’ve been reading your blog backwards and am loving it. Here’s the question I keep wondering…does your husband take out your garbages? I keep trying to figure out why it’s not on your list…maybe it’s something you are really good at that just comes naturally. For me it’s always on “the list”
Dana White says
He does! I am soooo thankful that I never (ever ever) have to think about that. He takes care of it twice a week on our pick up days.
Kimberly says
Coming out of Survival mode one day at time. Yesterday I felt overwhelmed today I started reading your blog again after a few weeks off as I did the crazy thing and participated in a group consignment sale. Sold $480 worth of kid stuff we don’t need.
So Today I
Got the kids to school on time
Loaded and ran my dishwasher
the first of many loads of laundry for the day
Did puzzles with my 4 year old.
Cleaned my center Island
Went through the next size of clothes to take inventory
And balanced my check book.
It’s Only 2PM so 3 more hours to add more to my Done list.
Juanita Knight says
I just recently found your blog and have been reading it from the beginning. I am hoping to get caught up in the next couple of weeks. IT seems that we are living parallel lives. Except my dear husband is the slob and I have a 13 year old son. I feel like I can never keep the house clean. My husband works different sifts at work, sometimes 7 days straight. I d9n’t expect him to do any real cleaning when he works like that. I am a substitute teacher and work most days of the week. So, in my efforts to get my house under control and to have more time to relax on the weekends 8 have started a daily checklist for my son and I. Here it is…
Son—
AM
Take shower
Make bed
Eat breakfast
Feed/Water dog
PM
Unload/Reload dishwasher
Garbage
Homework
5 minute pick-up of dining room
5 minute pick-up of bedroom before bed.
Mom—
AM
Take shower
Make bed
Eat breakfast
Pack lunch for work
PM
Make dinner
Wash dinner dishes
Sweep kitchen floor
Clean out fridge
Clean off the top of the fridge
Dad—pick-up after himself.
We all completed our lists. I’m just hoping we can keep up the momentum. Thank you for sharing your deslobification process. You rock!
Joni says
Since you say you love comments on very old posts, here is one. I’ve been reading your old posts for a few weeks now and they are helping my mind more than anything else. This blog is wonderful. I get your emails now too so I guess I’m reading past and present at the same time lol. I will probably be sad when I catch up, but when I do I have a long email for you to tell you all the ways you have helped me. Keep posting! Ps I read your book too
Crystal says
Dear Nony,
A little bit about me: I was at home with my kids 4 years ago, doing the whole – housewife thing. My husband rarely lifted a finger because he worked full time and he expected that taking care of the house was my job – since I was home all day anyway. Made sense to me – but no matter how hard I tried… I just couldn’t keep it up. I was super stressed, depressed and upset with myself because I couldn’t get my home under control.
Rather than figuring it out (like you did)- I gave up and got a full-time job and now the house is not just “my job” it’s my husband’s job too. I figured this was the solution because I knew I couldn’t do it by myself – so I might as well make a living and we can go back to splitting up the chores. But 4 years later, as I work 40 hours a week, away from home – our house is still out of control. My husband helps, but I’m the biggest problem (because I’m the slob of the family.)
Finding you recently, reading your blog backwards, watching your videos and listening to your audio book makes me want to try the stay-at-home-mom thing again. I felt I didn’t give it my all back then and I know I can do better now. I wish I could figure out a routine that gets my home in order these days but I can’t. Mainly because my current excuse is that I don’t have time to: clean, cook, exercise AND have time for myself and the kids when I’m working all week.
But I’m not going to quit my job… because we really do need my income, I’m going to just keep reading your blog while I continue to do the dishes daily – and hopefully soon think of a routine that will work with my schedule. Thank you for being my inspiration Nony! (and yes, I only commented here because I know how much you love new comments on really old blog posts.)
Amanda says
Yesterday, I was feeding my “Neat Freak” friend’s rabbit, and when I spilled the bunny water on her bathroom floor, I made a discovery that made me so happy. As I wiped the floor, I found that the bottom of her toilet was really filthy. Dust. Hair. Fur. Sand. It was all there. I wasn’t rejoicing in her failure; I was just ecstatic with the relief of thinking that she is not some hyper-clean superhuman whom I could never aspire to be. Her life creates mess. She has a 1yo and a bunny and an at-home career, and they all bring a certain amount of chaos. Likewise, my own family and life are going to create messes in our home. That’s okay! If I just breathe, and tackle the messes that make sense to tackle today, the mess doesn’t have to interfere with living.
I’m not quite a slob, but homeschooling and 4 young kids are pushing me in that direction. But I’ve been reading your posts, and have found much inspiration – even practical steps to follow! We’ve begun using checklists for each of us (Hubby not included):
-2yo and I pick up clutter together
-4yo clears the breakfast dishes, then wipes the table and one chair (the dirtiest one)
-6yo wipes the bathroom counter and the toilet
-I make my bed, sweep and tidy the kitchen before bed, and get a load of laundry hung outside on the nice days
-everyone big enough to open drawers puts away laundry
-on Friday, we dust, vacuum, and mop, and I clean the bathrooms with adult attention to detail
As you’ve also discovered, it can be quick and easy to do these few things; but we MUST DO THEM for them to actually work! Thank you for the proof in word and pictures you get me motivated! And thank you for being “normal” – not boring/conforming normal, just down-to-earth, totally relatable, if-she-can-do-it-I-can-do-it normal.
Susan Koble says
Well, first I started reading forwards. Then I decided to read backwards (it IS 2018). Unfortunately, your later “posts” are pretty much podcasts, and I don’t have the bandwidth (or time) to listen. I squeeze in reading while I’m working. So, I went back to where I left off reading forward. Regardless, my house is cleaner with a bit less clutter. Thanks!
Amber says
I’ve noticed that too. I had read from the beginning, then when I caught up Nony had stopped sharing the story with us via posts. So now, a year after finding this life/marriage/sanity saving blog, I just started reading from the beginning again!!
Nony, I really do miss having your blog posts on a daily basis. I know it’s almost summer now so you’d be on by anyway, but I will totally be waiting with baited breath this fall!!
Sharon Steponick says
I used the SHE index cards for several years back in the day. Then we moved to a different house (LIFE) and the cards didn’t fit the new place so well and I gave up.
I found the Kindel version of the book and am working on a digital to-do list (instead of index cards) using an app on my phone called ‘Color Note’. BEST APP EVER!!!
I use the checklist feature for my grocery list, a packing list when I go out of town, a checklist for when I pack up for our monthly craft nights out together with friends, gift lists, and even my testimony and a sermon I preached one Sunday (which really helped because I could click the point off my checklist and stay on track with my message, as well as rearranging points when I was actually writing what I wanted to talk about).
Mim says
So I have been reading your blog from the very beginning. I enjoy your writing style and have also enjoyed the podcast. While I don’t consider myself a slob neither am I the neat freak. I do recognize that my clutter threshold is really small so I have to continually purge. The kitchen and the laundry folding is what gets me out of control more days than I care to think about. I can get the laundry washed but we have to dig in baskets often. Also I love to cook but doing dishes…..not so much. I am probably what you would call mildly disorganized, but my house doesn’t get cleaned every week. I spot clean off and on whenever I have an extra minute or two. I do love to clean though but with 4 children 6 to 1 I feel like I am always running behind! Anyway all this to say is that I am enjoying your blog and it has helped me get rid and pitch a lot of things because I realized that those things are what I was maintaining and it was wearing me out!
Kixxy says
I like seeing what you did each day since it reminds me that “I” need to be doing things each day.
It really hit home in one of your blogs when you talked about every day resetting and you need to do things again. I always feel that if I have vacuumed the stairs that that should be good for a month…if I’m honest, a year…but I know it needs to be done on a regular basis so that it isn’t a big deal…and I get offended that the dust has decided to return when I just got rid of it two days ago…it crushes my spirit to think that I need to make this a weekly or twice weekly task…I was just so proud of myself to have done it once, after I finally got a clear surface. I think I need to go back to the start of your blogs again and see how you slowly added a non-negotiable task. I think I added too many things too quickly and have now fallen into not doing any on a regular basis. I fear this will be a long, arduous process with me.
TK says
So it’s not weird to comment 10 years after this was posted… A trip down memory lane. Fast forward to the future. I listened to your book on Audible and it struck the logic center of my brain to do the “hard/necessary” decluttering to get my car into the garage before winter hit in MN. It worked, I can park in the 1 car garage AND walk around 2 side to get to the trash bin. Anyway thank you!
Dana White says
I love this! I know this is a BIG deal!
Kae says
Well. You asked for it.
I’ve been reading backwards through your posts for a long while now. Maybe a couple months? Not sure. I’m one of those somewhat “normal” people that loves organizing and cleaning, but I’m like you because I see it as a Project and not an Everyday Thing for Life. Your blog (and books) have helped me a lot to get on those daily tasks which make a huuuge difference around here.
And I got crazy today and browned up a bunch of ground beef to freeze for easy meals later based on your post.
Mary says
Well, I am reading your old posts INSTEAD of doing my daily chores. I emptied the dishwasher, swept the floor (the mudroom and hall as well as the kitchen) and I ate breakfast, but I still need to make the bed, and do my exercises and kitty litter. Unfortunately, it’s already noon. I haven’t developed all the habits yet and I’ve been sliding on some of them that I previously did better. And I am allergic to chocolate, too! I really need to get that 5 minute pickup going every day. I guess every day starts with ONE day. I was about to say, maybe I will make today that day, but then I remembered the line in the Lord of the Rings, “Today is not that day”. OK, just kidding, I will go and do that NOW. Today will be the day. Love YOU.