First, let me admit that my car (actually a pre-millenial Suburban) is messy.
I have cleaned it out twice this summer, BIG cleanouts. But as I’m learning with my house, big clean-outs are not the answer to clutter problems. It’s those pesky, small-but-consistent clean-outs that make the difference.
Anyway, it’s bad. My three kids are well-trained in the art of taking-turns-opening-doors. Meaning . . . on breezy days, only open one door at a time lest you create a wind-tunnel effect and your Sunday School papers from last month go flying out into the parking lot.
But I now know, without a doubt . . . . that mine is not the worst. How, you ask, do I know that?
I’ve seen the worst.
I don’t have a picture, which means that I do not qualify as a cut-throat blogger, out for the story. I thought about taking a picture. The reason I looked inside was out of curiosity about why the people walking in front of us had stopped to stare . . . and had taken a picture. I even had a camera with me.
It would have been perfect to post here, but I couldn’t do it. As a slob, I know the fear of one of my own messes being shown to the world by a gawker, without even a chance to come up with a story about how “it’s almost never this bad.”
I post a lot of embarrassing clutter pictures on the blog, but it’s me that’s posting them.
But I will describe it. As I said, we were walking through a parking lot and saw a man and woman stop and look into a car. They stared and stared, and then she got out her camera, took a picture, and they walked on. It was a nice looking car, and I couldn’t imagine what they had been staring at.
And then we walked past, and I glanced in. Like them, I stopped and stared.
Just below window level, everywhere but the driver’s seat, there was trash. Styrofoam cups, containers, napkins, etc. You could not see the seats or the floor or the insides of the doors . . . at all.
Trash.
The only space in the car not completely filled to the windows with trash was the driver’s seat. The trash in the passenger’s seat would have had to brush against his/her arm, up to the shoulder, while driving.
It was shocking. I honestly thought that it must be some kind of modern art piece, making a statement about society.
Shell says
Although my curiosity and imagination have been sparked – I'm glad you didn't take the picture. I wouldn't have been able to take the picture either. It's one thing when we bare our own souls for the world to see but something just doesn't seem right about baring someone else's.
Sarah says
We once had a phone call from the police to say our father's car had been found trashed and abandoned. Upon further questioning we discovered it had been 'found' in his office parking lot. It was that messy the police believed it to have been stolen and trashed. Rest assured, theres a lot worse than you.
Cherish says
WOW! Even just imagining it, it's shocking.
Nony the Slob says
Sarah, that right there is my nightmare!
MAMom says
You were in Marshfield, MA today?? J/K, but…
I once had maggots, yes, that's right, maggots in my car. Now I clean my car out every week. it's on my list.
T says
me too! maggots. from fruit flies. from spilled juice. i now have a new car and require the kids to help me empty it every time we get home. all the way. before we do anything else. it’s lovely and clean for over a year now.
Nony the Slob says
MAMom, your comment made me laugh out loud!
I think I've written a post before about having maggots that "grew" out of the acorns left in the cupholders of our stroller, that the boys had picked up on our walks to school! Most. Disgusting. Thing. Ever.
shelssc says
I just randomly came across your blog and I love it – I am also on a personal decluttering mission having read "Clearing your Clutter with Feng Shui" about 2 1/2 years ago. I go to goodwill about once a month and still have so much to go.
Nony the Slob says
Hi shelssc,
Welcome! I'm glad you found me!
Shanna says
I once got pulled over for speeding and the cop decided to search my car. Haha! He quickly became a not-fan of that idea and just wrote me a ticket!
Amy says
I am reading your blog from start to finish, and I just have to say I am enjoying it so much–you are absolutely hilarious, and you are helping me see that I need to keep up my own maintenance during the week so my entire weekends aren’t spent cleaning! One thing that works for me is every time I fill up my car with gas, I use the time the tank is filling to throw away trash. Now, if only I could remember to bring everything inside that needs to go in!
Nony says
Thanks so much! That’s so smart to use that time while putting gas in your car! I do everything I can to time it so Hubby has to pump gas instead of me, but when I do . . . I should totally do that!
peigi says
I have to admit that when I began reading this post a fear crept through me that you had actually seen MY car!
Nony says
Oh no! This one was over-the-top, should-be-on-the-news messy!
MG says
There are a few cars like that in town! I started cleaning our van every wed while my oldest DS is at piano. We only have 30 min so not much we can otherwise do. And it NEEDS it! Every week. It’s a little sad. Clean out garbage, take out non-car items, vacuum, wipe down surfaces. It was partly spurred by my kids inviting the twin neighbor boys with a neat freak mom to AWANA. Our van was relatively clean for us. They mentioned it was messy and their’s never is! So I’ve been shamed by twin 8 year old boys. Whatever works. It’s nice having my 2 other DS help with the job too! Little dd looks on, observing.
Kristin says
When I was in high school, my grandparents lived in Vegas. We went out to visit during a school break and while we were out there, we were walking through one of the casino parking garages and noticed that a car was smoking pretty bad from the engine area. My father helped the guy put out what ended up being a fire under the hood. When you got close enough to actually see inside the car, it looked very similar to the car you describe above. My mom was just astonished at the state it was in and (after getting out of hearing distance from the guy) exclaimed that it was good that the fire got put out so quickly because all of the paper and trash inside the car would have gone up in a huge fireball. My sister-in-law’s car isn’t quite as bad, but she could never just offer someone a ride off the cuff. My car usually has a bunch of trash and papers in the floorboard so you have to shuffle it to the side so you don’t possibly smash anything. And half the back seat will have jackets and blankets and a random stuffed animal or two living on it. The other half is my daughter’s booster seat. Sorry for such a long post, but I just wanted to reenforce the fact that you are not alone in this struggle. 🙂
Lisa says
Interesting. Historically I’ve always kept my car pretty tidy. I’m not sure if it’s because it’s a small space so it seems easier to stay on top of or because other people can so easily see it on a daily basis (as opposed to the inside of my house which people rarely see). I allow my son to keep 1 book in the car, but any other toys, papers, etc. get taken inside once we get home. Which is not to say they don’t get immediately dumped somewhere inside the house… Maybe it’s a way of keeping my messiness a secret? Appear tidy in public?
Cheryl says
I, too, have seen that car!! It is something that has stayed with me all these years since (at least 10, maybe 15). I’ve actually seen it twice — once at the outlet mall and once at the regular shopping mall. Have never figured out how she would take her purchases home….
I can’t throw any stones but that was impressive and I understand your need to blog about it.