Really, all of the clues so far have been pretty in-my-face. No sleuthing required.
But how our master bedroom repeatedly falls into chaos . . . still feels like a mystery to me.
Clue #3: Last minute shoving.
Brought about by items not being in their homes when the doorbell is scheduled to ring. Brought about by not putting those items in their homes when I should.
Blech.
Anyway, today was a free day because my newly five-year-old is sick. ON her birthday. Yes, please feel sorry for her.
Since she was sick on our normally crazy-busy-out-of-the-house day, I decided to tackle something. Ideally, days like this would be great for digging out the clutter from a hidden spot. Instead, I dug out the clutter from a seen-every-day-and-tripped-over-every-night spot.
The twang of guilt that I felt while hubby tripped three times as he tried to quietly head to the bathroom at 5:30 this morning . . . might have something to do with why I chose this spot.
I had been doing better. The master bedroom hadn’t been as bad. It also hadn’t been good.
Then, the princess party happened. And the seasonal-clothing-changeover happened. Suddenly it looked like that picture up there.
I answered the in-my-head-whiny-voice’s typical “WHERE do I start?” with what has become my mantra of late: Do the easy stuff first.
The rocking chair that has a definite place in the living room but had to be moved for the party? Easy.
The vacuum cleaner that has its very own closet? Easy.
The empty laundry basket that can be easily stacked under the other laundry baskets whose fates I’m still pondering? Easy.
After the easy stuff, it looked like this:
That’s the mid-math of the seasonal clothing changeover. (Mid-math as opposed to aftermath, which is what it would be if I were actually done with the project.) I finished going through the clothes. Which also meant bringing back the dish-barrel-that-doubles-as-a-table where I store the other out-of-season clothes.
Once I was done, I had to decide whether to put the lid/table-top back on in its still-cluttered-state. (Yes, I had skillfully removed the tabletop with clutter intact.)
I got a little crazy and cleaned it off. Here’s the thing. Hubby empties his pockets on that table. Sorting through the contents of someone else’s emptied pockets can be a tedious job. Pre-blog, I would have let my frustration over that sorting-job put me over the edge, and it’s more-than-possible that I would have somehow blamed him and his pocket-emptying for the chaotic state of the master bedroom.
Which would have been totally untrue.
I take responsibility for the state of the master bedroom. I’m the mindless-clothes-dropper. I’m the last-minute-shover. I’m not saying he doesn’t have any part in it, but how in the world can I expect him to be perfect in every thing he does when it’s me who lets it get to this overall state?
Anyway, I did the tedious sorting job, and decided to try something. I like the look of the table completely cleared:
But that is unrealistic. He needs a place to empty out his pockets. So I grabbed an unused container that happened to match, and a trash can, and I set up a pocket-emptying-station for him, right where he does it anyway.
Maybe I’ll remember to tell him. Or maybe he’ll read this post and know that he is free to dump the trash in the trashcan and the important stuff in the little basket. It may not be a perfect plan, but it’s better than no plan at all.
Then, I moved the suitcase back to my closet and took the after picture:
And felt guilty for purposely cutting this out of the picture:
Proof that finding a clue doesn’t necessarily stop the problem.
And in minutes (literally), it looked like this:
This “last minute shoving” clue isn’t just a master-bedroom problem. It’s a whole-house problem. When things don’t have a home, or aren’t in their home, the master bedroom becomes the last minute dumping ground. When that happens, the motivation to attend to details like proper-pocket-sorting-techniques or still-clean-clothing-hanging . . . evaporates.
While I know from way-too-much experience that the work I did today on the master bedroom won’t magically keep it clean forever, I can say that each time I have worked in the master bedroom since beginning my deslobification process has been a little easier than the time before. And the results have lasted a little longer.
That’s progress, right?
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On Friday, I’ll be linking this up to Orgjunkie.com’s 52 Weeks of Organizing.
I'm a huge "shover" too… the spare/guest room is our regular dumping ground – until we have guests that is – then into our room! Alas – I too am finding it is getting better.
Great job…
Oh me too! We have a big table in our bedroom that my husband uses for his miniatures games, and I am constantly promising myself it's going to get cleared off and stay cleared off, but it's right by the doorway and the most convenient place to just shove stuff. It's not as bad as it used to be, but still not good. Good luck!!
Wow Nony – you've come a long way from taking the mstr bedroom doorknob off. What a great job! I'm very guilty of the last minute shoving. I often end up shoving it in the spare room, close the door and then out of sight out of mind for – well, for a long time. LOL
I have no doubt your spot created for your husband will solve many a trouble. I've always found if I don't force an organizing solution – take my time and pay attention to how we really live and then find a solution that fits with our habits – those are the solutions that ultimately work and become part of "life" without us even realizing it.
Love that you're including more photos on your blog now too.
This has inspired me to tackle the 'shove pile' in my room too! Well done! <3
I have to admit…my master is the shove all room too! I have this way of thinking that as long as the rest of the house looks good, my personal space can handle everything else. Not a good idea but in a small house with no storage its all I got. Maybe this weekend I will get it all under control! 🙂
I have the same problem. I also don't have an outdoor storage space for extra storage. No garage to place dh's fishing gear, tools, etc. And to make matters worse, our master closet is tiny. Needless to say, we're drowning in stuff. May I reiterate that dh is a big packrat? And my parents are very "giving" with toys and treats? I'm hoping to get rid of stuff before someone calls Hoarders.
Shoving also equals unmade decisions, no? My little one is visiting Grandma for a few days, and I have waaaaaay too much to do during that time, including cleaning out her "shoved" closet, a LOT of sewing, a LOT of computer work…in other words, enough stuff to fill approximately four times the amount of time available to me. Ah well. :>)
I'm a huge "Shover" into my room. No one can see it, and it is a dumping ground for my own procrastination. Right now I have a feeling I have some shoving to sort out!
I understand what you mean about blaming him for the whole room because of a small part of it. I have caught myself doing that also and have tried to put a stop to that blame game and take responsibility for my own shortcomings. Way to go.
Yah- I've been outed many times by my husband about the table on my side of bed (which by the way I have kept clean for a few weeks). Usually he would point that out when I would blame him for the clothes on the floor. Ha- he can't do that now that I've cleaned up my act!
Yep, our master bedroom is the dumping ground for all wayward-OMG-who-pulled-into-the-driveway? stuff…. And I've thought the same thing about my husband's stuff…and come to the same realization that you have…. knowing that if I clean up my stuff, and the only stuff left around is his stuff, then he can't say I'm making the mess… I just helped my husband with his pocket-dumping-spot at the end of our kitchen counter this past week…. Great job!!
Yes, yes, yes!! You are making great progress. I think fixing something for DH is really great because then he knows you are thinking of him. I am sorry for your dear daughter too. Hope she is all better by now.
Um, yah, I think I'll go tackle are room now-at least for about a half hour before church! And, no, don't look for pictures on my blog. Just not feeling that brave right now! Thanks for the inspiration!
One of the best things I ever did to help the clutter in my house was to give my husband a basket to empty his pockets into. It eliminates the endless search for keys and wallets and keeps flat surfaces (relatively) clear of clutter. Men really do need a place to empty their pockets where we don’t feel the need to add to the clutter!
I am digging my way out of a mess in my bedroom. Our master bath is still “under construction” from last January’s toilet fountain show so I have three BIG tubs of that kind of stuff and all of my clothes crammed with hubs clothes and since there is “stuff” in front of the closet, the pile seems to grow and breed at night. Too cold to go out so I will use nap time to unearth some carpet today (while listening to your podcasts, of course!)
I need to start a blog, or a journal, or something…I have begun the de-slobification, de-clutter, de-stress whatever you wish to call it, Now I need a place to chronicle it, to watch it happen, somewhere I can see that i am making progress even if some days are only baby steps…. I’d really like to connect with people like you and others who are constantly struggling with the same issues
Blogging is very fun, and a great motivation!
This is encouraging me to attack my piles of stuff. I finally got rid of the boxes that my generous family put my Christmas gifts in. I have hung my new blouses and sweaters, but those boxes were sitting in the living room. I still need to put the lotions and bath gels away. shame on me.