I got my hair cut and colored yesterday.
Having a new haircut and roots that actually match the ends of my hair . . . feels sooooo good.
I’m pretty sure I walked a little taller today, put a bit more care into my make-up, and had an easier time remembering to suck in my tummy.
When someone this morning at my Bible study commented on how incredibly gorgeous I looked (actually they just said they liked my hair, but I assume that was what they meant), I laughed that I have an event this weekend and how I need a deadline to actually get it done.
You know me, always sharing too much information that no one cares about.
Anyway, one of the three hairdressers in my group was horrified. (The other two weren’t there yet.)
And my I’m-so-cute-balloon deflated a little as I had to defend myself. It’s the time . . . the money . . . the fact that I’m not obsessed with superficial things like how I look.
All terribly noble excuses.
But the reality is that I treat my hair the same way I treat my house.
And my family.
And myself.
For some reason, the people who will be in the audience on Friday night when I sing Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy are more important than my husband.
More important than making him proud to introduce his wife to his co-workers.
For some reason, the comfort of the people who visit our home (and who I assume don’t want to sit on pointy and uncomfortable toys) is more important than the comfort of my family.
And I KNOW my family doesn’t want to sit on . . . or step on . . . or trip over things.
As I go through this deslobification process, and I call myself on so many lame excuses, I am getting better at doing what I need to do because it needs to be done, not just because there’s a deadline looming.
I’m not saying that excuses such as money/time/lack-of-focus-on-fru-fru aren’t also legitimate reasons for me to go (way) longer than six weeks between hair appointments.
They are.
And I do believe that it’s perfectly fine for the house to look more “lived-in” on a random Tuesday than for an office Christmas party, but I have to be careful that my reasons don’t turn into excuses.
Sometimes, it’s such a fine line between the two.
______________________
mrs. fisher's findings says
so, where's a photo of your new 'do?
Mama Rachel says
Oh, Nony! I just love your candor! I so could have written this post– I do the same thing, all the time. Bless you for your blog, your honesty, and the inspiration you give. I needed that little bit of "conscience jab" this afternoon. 🙂
Patty says
Wonderful post, so well said!! I think we are all guilty of this at least some of the time. I feel especially bad about the state of the master bedroom right now. I'd never let guests see it, but my poor dear husband has to sleep there. Time to get it clean. Thanks for the inspiration and kick in the ass!
Nony the Slob says
Believe me Mrs. Fischer, I'll be shooting that headshot that I've been planning to take to use when I (hopefully) start doing some speaking . . . today! Maybe I'll share.
Thanks so much for the kind words, Mama Rachel.
And Patty, I LAUGHED when you said your poor dear husband has to sleep in there. So true here too!
Busy Mommy says
Totally, totally agree with your post. Have to remember how much effort I put into getting my husband!! 😛 Now that I have him, don't want to let things slide just cuz. It's easy to just let things go, and as I look at my messy, messy kitchen, I'm thankful he's not terribly vocal about my bad performance at "my job", but I do need to be reminded that what I do (or don't do) affects others, especially the love of my life! 🙂
Miko's Girl says
I can so identify with what you are saying. In addition, I have to learn that housecleaning is not an emotional issue – if life is going a bit emotionally rough, I use it as an excuse to wallow and not clean.
Kimberly says
Excellent post! If it makes you feel better, I haven't had my hair trimmed in …. about a year.
I definitely do not have the interest in getting to the salon every 6-8 weeks…. way on the bottom of my list!
Anonymous says
Hello from a wee Scottish Lassie (the Clyde Valley near Glasgow to be exact.)
I am devouring your archives and have got up to May 2010 as of today. Just wanted to post and say how much I am enjoying it, thank you.
This post struck home for me.
Nony the Slob says
Hi Scottish Lassie! Welcome, and I'm glad you're here. Thanks so much for introducing yourself!
sillysiller says
wow…you are me!! I mean, I could have written this post. You are so right on many levels!!
Glad I found your blog.
emily says
I’ve been reading your blog from the beginning over the past several weeks. You have inspired me SO SO SO much! I’ve created my own daily tasks list, which I’ve done every day – for a week! I’ve created a list of “top priority” tasks – those things that I’ve been meaning to do for SO LONG but just haven’t gotten around to. I keep four “top priority” tasks on my list at all times. And I’ve been getting them done! I’ve also decided to focus on one room each month. I’ve made a list of all things that need to be done in that room – patching holes, repainting, decluttering, deep cleaning, etc. This month (January 2013!) is my two bathrooms. I feel so good about this plan – can you tell I’m a list maker? My problem is the follow-through… I have a hard time actually DOING the things on my list. Anyway, this post really resonated with me. As I sit here with 1″ (or more) roots that needed attention a month ago. I seem to have a problem actually picking up the phone to make that hair appointment. Ugh. I really identify myself with you and I realize that my slobbishness is affecting all parts of my life. Thank you for helping me get myself together! (And now that I’ve actually commented, I’m sure I’ll be commenting more on your other older posts!)
Nony says
Yay! I love comments!
peigi says
Once again, you managed to articulate something that hangs around in the back of my head refusing to be articulated or acknowledged. Thanks for you and your blog.
Maureen says
Um, ouch! My husband has said this to me before and I try really hard to deny it. But the truth is, I care more about random people seeing my house messy than I do about his comfort! And I treat my hair the same way too. Six weeks? Try six months, and counting. Even if we don’t have the money for a haircut every six weeks, we could probably eek one out more than twice a year at best. Maybe I need to adjust my thinking a bit.
Rebecca says
Again this is so me! I’m so glad I found your blog!
Shelly says
I just love that you are so honest about your struggles (all of them, not just keeping a clean house). You are very courageous to put it all out there. Makes me feel better that I’m not the only person in the world with these problems.
I think it is awesome how you always speak good and positive things about your husband. I am like you in that I seem to only care about the house being clean, how well dressed I am, etc when there is a special occasion. I need to learn to think like you and realize that my husband deserves to live in a clean house and be able to be proud of his wife.
Sort of along the same line….I recently read the blog post about when you have little people living in the home and not getting upset about what anyone else in the home is doing (or not doing). You stated that you were just going to focus on yourself and what things you could do to keep your house clean. This was an inspirational post for me as I feel like everything should be even between me and my husband. I have no children and work outside the home so I get upset when I’m the only person trying to keep the house clean. That post made me realize that having that attitude is not going to get my house clean and will just make my marriage miserable. So from now on I am going to try to focus on changing myself and not worry about what my husband isn’t doing.
And you are incredibly funny!
Dana White says
Oh thank you, Shelly!
sharon says
Still reacting to deadlines here, but I’m SO motivated in reading your blog from oldest post to latest.
Thanks for your inspiration, honesty & wit!