For most of my adult life, I treated housekeeping as a project without realizing that was what I was doing.
I would clean like a maniac, get it “perfect” and then feel completely shocked when I looked up three days later to see it was back to being a mess.
When I started what I now call my deslobification process (out of total desperation), I didn’t know what to do, but I knew the way I’d always done things hadn’t worked.
At all.
I started as small as I possibly could, focusing on creating habits and keeping up with them. I was so surprised when the daily habits (doing dishes, sweeping the kitchen, checking the bathrooms for clutter, etc.) had a much bigger, and more lasting effect on my home than any of those marathon cleaning sessions ever did.
It was only after I saw the difference daily tasks made that I realized I was much better off focusing on the small things than on exhausting cleaning “projects” that didn’t have a lasting impact.
Decluttering can be a project. That’s the one thing I like about it. Once something has left my house, it’s gone. (Not that other things don’t appear to take its place.)
But even with decluttering, I have to fight against viewing my overall house as a project.
I used to think I needed to wait until I had a chunk of time available (hours, days or weeks) to declutter.
Which meant I rarely decluttered.
Now, I know I can make decluttering progress in five minutes. Or even five seconds, by throwing away trash or sticking something in the Donate Box as soon as I realize it’s clutter.
Instead of putting it back on top of the pile and lamenting my lack of time to spend on a decluttering project.
And when I do have five hours to spend decluttering, I make so much more progress because I don’t have to first peel back the layer of stuff that should have been thrown in the trash or stuck in the Donate Box a long time ago.
If you’re desperate to declutter but suffering from Decluttering Paralysis, you need The 5 Day Clutter Shakedown. You don’t need five days to devote to it. The steps I teach you will help you make progress (and only progress) in any amount of time you have available, even if that’s only five minutes.
“I live in my home.”
says it all.
I am so thankful to have found your podcast! I have been listening for a couple of weeks now and I love it. I have a problem with clutter and procrastination and I feel like you think just like I do! I don’t really have a problem with keeping laundry or dishes done; however, folding laundry right from the dryer has been a game changing strategy for me! You have helped me get rid of lots of clutter just in the last week! Thanks!!!
One time when my children were little, I put my kitchen on project status. I was bound and determined that my kitchen would be clean, FINALLY. I stayed up half the night cleaning my kitchen to get it decent and went to bed exhausted. I woke up to the sound of one of my children at my door saying, “Mom! We’ve been robbed.” The sad part was that my child was serious. The even sadder part was that after my cleaning spree, I needed to rest, for days and my kitchen did not stay “robbed” very long. My house has always been a struggle. I put rooms on project status, then get discouraged when I leave the house and come home from work with another mess (that I did not create.) I’ve just finished listening to How to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind and I’m about to start it over again to keep the motivation going. Finally I feel hope, finally I’ve read (listened to) a book written by someone who understands me. I don’t know what day I’m on now, but I have accomplished so much more than I have before. I sit here looking at my kitchen after a couple of days of not having all my dishes done and counters piling back up and the floor with a few napkins and candy wrappers and groceries that haven’t been put away and a card table that has gotten piled up since getting it out for New Years Eve foods. I feel fear of the progress slipping away, fear of one more failure. But tonight, I will …”Take a breath and just do the dishes (and pizza boxes) and just maybe get the card table cleaned off and put away and maybe the floor swept and maybe the receipts cleaned out of my bathroom drawer when I go use my half bathroom so I can close that drawer (I got the other drawer able to close a couple days ago). Here I go….It looks like a lot….Deep Breath, Dishes…..
About three months ago I said to a friend “I realized that I’ve always thought that if I got my entire apartment, every inch, clean at the same time that it would magically be clean all the time.” I know this isn’t true! There is no logical reason for it to be true. But I actually still think it.
But, funnily enough, noticing that I think that has helped a lot. I feel way more motivated to clean one thing now. I think it’s because when I notice myself feeling like cleaning a little won’t matter – since it won’t achieve magical total cleanliness – I also think “Self, you’re being silly. It’ll feel a lot nicer in here even if you can only do that one thing!”
And, of course, the winter break mess gets cleaned up a lot faster if I spend a few minutes on it every day, rather than waiting until I find the energy to do it all at once. That’s REALLY magical.
When I was much younger, I had read an article about keeping you home tidy by practicing to ‘never leave a space empty handed’. When your get ready to leave an area, put back anything you touched, pick up any dish that needs to go to the kitchen, anything to go in the garbage, an article of clothing removed needing to go in the hamper/closet, and deposit them on my way to my next space. This style of leaving an area worked great for me.
Then I got married and had 3 children. Even though I continued to do the best with the above style it wasn’t enough. But would do this when going from room to room, pause & pick up, deposit, etc.
Another (decluttering) article said that if you are going around the house to tidy up, take along a laundry basket or box and deposit it in the doorway of the entered room. Anything not belonging there is to be put in the basket. (if I child comes to chat, I would have them take personal items from it to put away 😉 ) As you go to the next space to tidy, take anything from the basket that belongs there and put it away. Add more to the basket while in that room, and so on during your day.
This helps me avoid this:
I call it “But-First Syndrome”. You know. It’s when you decide to do the laundry. So you start down the stairs with the laundry but then see the newspapers on the table. Ok, you’ll do the laundry.
BUT FIRST you decide to put the newspapers away. So on your way in to put the newspapers away, you notice the mail on the table. Ok, you’ll put the newspapers away.
BUT FIRST you’ll pay that bill that needs to be paid. So you look for the checkbook. Oops…there’s the baby’s bottle from yesterday on the floor. Ok, you’ll pay the bill.
BUT FIRST you need to but the bottle in the sink. You head for the kitchen. Darn it, there’s the remote for the TV. What’s it doing here? Ok, you’ll put the bottle in the sink.
BUT FIRST you need to put the remote away. Head for the TV room. Aaagh! Stepped on the cat. Cat needs to be fed. Okay, you’ll put the remote away.
BUT FIRST you need to feed the cat…
So here’s what happens at the end of the day…
Laundry is not done, newspapers on the floor, bottle on the table, bills unpaid, checkbook still lost, cat ate the remote control…
And when you try to figure out how come nothing got done all day, you are baffled because………………you KNOW you were BUSY ALL DAY!!!!
That’s the “But-First Syndrome”. Author Unknown
Tammy, I hope you got all that done and more, and have been able to keep it up daily! 🙂 I’m sending encouraging thoughts your way – it’s hard to argue with kids who think you’ve been robbed if you clean the kitchen. One of mine said to me just last month I think, “is someone coming over?” when I cleaned up the dining room table… 🙁
Rachel, very insightful! 🙂 I think we all are deceived by the thought of a “picture-perfect” house, the one in the magazine pages, that never gets messy. Oh, we think, once the kids are gone or the husband is retired or my dog passes away… ha! It’s never true. What a lie we tell ourselves! 🙂 But it’s good to recognize these thoughts & remember, it will feel better with the dishes done, or the table cleared, or the floor swept. A little action goes such a long way!
Dana, thank you again for calling attention to the Slob brain, and the way things can sneak up on us. I’ll be working this afternoon on a project, and no, that doesn’t include keeping my house clean! 😉 Haha…
So true! It’s so easy to be frustrated by all those big “projects” that I don’t have time to tackle perfectly, while overlooking the countless little piles and messes that are actually annoying me every single day (like the pile of clothes in the bedroom or stack of mail on the counter) and could be dealt with before my tea kettle boils!
I do what I can each day ( or at least try)with my health issues. I set the timer for 15 minutes and see whst I can accomplish, then if I am able, I set it for another 15 minutes. I once thought everything had to be done all at once and perfect – now I am happy when I see the progress each day. I still have much to do, but you have given me so much inspiration to keep working and not get discouraged.