I loved this email I received recently from Jane at Sappari Solutions:
Dear Dana,I have been following your blog for awhile. I found out about you when I purchased a book bundle and got your first book (28 days). I really appreciate you sharing your experiences with the world. I am a professional organizer. Reading your blog and books and listening to your podcasts has given me a lot of insight into what my clients are dealing with and how they think. I loved your podcast about containers and the one in one out rule. It never occurred to me that someone would not grasp that concept.I identify with you saying your work is your mission because I feel the same way about mine. If I can help someone make their life easier or less stressful, I feel I am doing God’s work.I wish you continued success with your business!
It took me a while to realize that I struggle with these things because my brain works differently than an organized person’s brain works. Not better or worse, just different. I remember dreaming (back in the beginning of the blog) that maybe one day I could help organized people see and understand the workings of a disorganized person’s brain.
A little explanation of how my brain works: Defining Normal
The e-book mentioned above is now retired, but for detailed guides, check out my books: How to Manage Your Home Without Losing Your Mind and Decluttering at the Speed of Life.
What wonderful affirmation you’re on the right track. I am so proud of you.
YES! As you wrote in “Defining Normal”, the key is to accept your own quirks and find what works for you in your own frame of life. Thanks so much for helping us to see that!
I also wanted to say that I really appreciated your post on “Time is a Container.” Not only in our 24-hour days, but our whole life is a container. And while it is true that we make bucket lists and personal goals for ourselves, we have to also consider the legacy we leave to others. I thought about that as you wrote about your mother’s ways of dealing with a messy daughter: How she guided you and taught you to use your creativity to face your challenges and find a way to deal with them. My daughters are grown… I never realized when they were growing how much they needed to learn about housekeeping. But I have tried to encourage and guide them in their own homes to help them find peace and balance. When my container of time runs out, I want it to be like a river, still carrying goodness and refreshment to others after me.
God bless you!
I, too, am here learning how my husband thinks. And have stayed because I appreciate the wisdom and occasionally a kick in the…. ahem…
I do my dead-level best to appreciate all the things that he does. And I do… honestly! He cooks and does the grocery shopping and rotates the dishes (mostly) and cheerfully (mostly) is right there with me in the myriad projects I get involved in. He’s the bestest ever…
But he is a slob. He can’t clean a kitchen to save his soul… and the dirty bowl would stay in the living room for months when he was a bachelor… He didn’t even own a vacuum cleaner until we moved in together and I had mine…
And I can. not. wrap my brain around how he doesn’t see it. But he doesn’t. Some of it was/is depression and anxiety, but… I’m a woman to whom everything that is out of place or needs to be dealt with is like having a very soft continual tone you almost can’t hear. And when there are lots of somethings… it’s no longer a soft tone… it’s a loud chaotic overwhelming sound that you almost can’t talk over until things are dealt with. He’s a man to whom having three different kinds of mold colonies in the back of the fridge is a complete surprise even though they have been growing there for the last 3 months…
But I love him and he is a good man. I knew who he was when I married him and would do it again in a heart beat every day. You have helped with some of the frustration and gave me ways of thinking about his thinking that I haven’t thought of!
Thank you for helping make my marriage better. 🙂
I love this comment!! And I like the explanation of what it’s like for those who don’t have Slob Vision!!
I read your blog to understand the “slob” in my life. I don’t want to change them but it impacts everything: No friends over to their house, so much lost time looking for things, interferes with their family relationships. I am saddened as the children make “I wish” comments. I am desperate to know how to help but any help offered is refused so I don’t make it an issue.
I must go and read that “normal” post again. I could use some encouragement. Getting exhausted and starting to feel un-fixable. 😛 Thanks so much, for blogging!! I knew if I could come and read your post of the day I would feel better.
The container rule is probably the wisest piece of advice I’ve ever received. And our homes shouldn’t be containers for containers of stuff. 🙂