If you are a regular reader, you know how much chore charts/checklists for my kids scared me. It wasn’t that I didn’t think my kids could do it. It wasn’t that I couldn’t find one with age appropriate chores.
It was me.
Any system that we’d tried before failed because of my own lack of focus. As a slob, I had a hard enough time keeping myself on track.
And every time we started a new system, anything from complicated charts and rewards to simply picking up before bedtime, we would go strong for a few days and then the system would fizzle, because I would lose my focus and forget to remind them. And the worst part of these failures? Each failure made me – and them – take the next system a little less seriously.
But in spite of my fears, I had to do something. I take my job of teaching and training my children extremely seriously in every other area of life, and so I must also train them in this one. Even though it’s one that is such a struggle for me.
This chore chart is based on the same concept I have been using on myself since starting this blog last August. Building habits. Breaking tasks down to the very basics.
Other people (normal people) naturally clean their kitchen nightly. They naturally pick up the living room or the bathroom floor before it becomes a disaster area.
I’m not normal.
These same people naturally teach their children to take their dishes to the sink after every meal and pick up their bedrooms before bed each night.
But since it never occurred to me to take my own dishes to the sink immediately after a meal, it definitely never occurred to me to have my children do it.
I have seen the huge benefits of my own simple daily tasks in our home. Making the bed, running the dishwasher every night and emptying it every morning, wiping down the bathrooms every night – these all make our home much more livable.
I began the chore chart with 5 simple tasks that I want my children to develop as habits. They are: Take dishes to sink after every meal. Put dirty clothes in the hamper. Feed the dog. Pick up bedroom before bed. Hang up coat and put shoes away.
All these things were sometimes done, sometimes not. Haphazardly, just like my pre-blog housekeeping ways.
We’ve been using the chart for over a month now, and the results?
It’s working!!!
How it works:
Each evening, I initial inside the boxes for each task completed that day. If they forget to take their dishes to the sink after breakfast, when I notice, I’ll cross through the box for that. That evening, they still have to take their dishes to the sink after supper, but they don’t get credit at all for that day. Same thing goes if I find a pair of dirty undies on the floor after they’ve left for school.
On Sunday evenings, I count up their initialed boxes. For every 10, they get one dollar. If they have 23, they get two dollars and have three boxes that count toward the next week. I cross off the initialed boxes as they’re paid. The chart can last more than a week. (I do have a chart I made on the computer, but since my printer is now dead/dying, I’ve been hand writing them.)
The boys had been asking to get an allowance, and so this is their way to earn it. I didn’t want to “pay them per task.” If I did that, I feel like they would pick and choose the things they liked doing. As it is, they have to do 10 tasks, two days worth, to make any money at all. They’re seeing how small amounts of money really add up. They can earn 3-4 dollars a week if they’re consistent in their tasks. (Mostly, though, it’s 2-3.)I think the boys are doing well because they are able to do each of these things completely on their own, read the chart independently, and are at an age where they are motivated by money. My 8 yo is saving for a specific high-dollar item, and it’s exciting to see his understanding increase in the concept of money. When we first started, he was skeptical about how long it would take to earn enough, but as he sees it add up, his motivation is increasing. Basically, it’s working because they’re not dependent on me for motivation.
With each task that is becoming a habit, I’m seeing a big impact on our home as a whole. It’s so nice to not have their clothing strewn across the house or a big pile of shoes at the back door.My 3 yo isn’t part of the chart system yet, but is doing well at several of the tasks just because she follows along with what the boys are doing. That just reminds me that I should have worked on these habits when they were younger, but rather than lament my many mistakes, I’m going to go from here. That’s really all I can do.
This is so great! I am making my list for daily habits tonight!
Interesting and timely post! I just started a chore chart with my boys (6 and 4) and it's working great with the 6 year old — not so much with the 4 yo. I think he's still too young. The 6 yo totally initiates most of the time, and if I ask him if he's done a particular chore and he hasn't, he will go do it immediately!
His chores include daily tasks such as opening and closing the blinds and feeding the cat, and weekly chores such as swiffering the steps. I'm also trying to get him in the habit of brushing his teeth in the morning (for some embarrassing reason, this doesn't happen very often), so I put that on the chart as well.
I like the idea of adding in clearing his plate after every meal. He usually does this, but I do have to remind him. If I put it on the chart, I bet he'll start doing it on his own.
As far as money, I've always sort of felt that allowance shouldn't be tied to chores — b/c they aren't optional. No one pays me for doing the laundry, yk? On the other hand, it is good to teach kids that work = pay, so maybe I can offer them bonus chores for cash? What are your thoughts, Nony?
Hi, MJ, I totally understand not wanting to tie allowance to chores. That exact dilemma kept me from implementing this sooner. It basically came down to the fact that I didn't have any system at all, and nothing I had done in the past had worked, both because I never remembered for very long to keep them on it, and because it wasn't enough to motivate them to remember after I lost focus. So I decided to go for the allowance thing. The reason I did it like I did was to try to keep it from being as much a feeling of being paid for each chore, and more of – If you do what you're supposed to do around here, you get an allowance. If you do it consistently, you get a little bigger allowance.
It also helped me a little to hear Dave Ramsey say on the radio that he calls it "commission" and tied basic chores to any money his kids would get. He talks about wanting his kids to learn that you have to work to get money. I don't fully understand the system he used with his kids, but the way he put it kind of made me feel freed up to tie their allowance to chores.
Sorry for the additional post in the comments, haha!
We have tried so many systems and we always fizzled out as well.
Right now they have been having so much homework I haven't really been making them do chores, but definately will have to come up with a system for the summer.
http://www.mommyoffaith19.blogspot.com
I'm not a normal person, either. It is so hard for me to keep the house clean! I am a horrible procrastinator, and by the time I get around to cleaning, it is so overwhelming, I don't know where to start.
The boys seem to be an issue, too. Sometimes they want to help, and sometimes they don't. But they never seem to want to clean up their messes. I think I may try implementing this chart for them and follow the same system as you do (10 chores = $1) and for myself, I think maybe I'll reward myself with craft money LOL. Thanks for the great idea!
I have a 4 year old daughter and she has had a chore chart since she was 2 years old. I found an amazing book I think you would like. It's called what every child should learn along the way. I got it on amazon after the author came to my church. I follow your blog daily and you have inspired me to clean myself up as well. My daughters chart has pictures and daily boxes. I put it in a sheet protector and she uses dry erase markers to X each chore. She makes her bed, picks up toys, clothes in hamper, wipes down her tv and the tv in the living room with a rag and some vineager water, vacuums her room with a little stick vac, wipes down the dining room table, feeds the fish, helps put away the silverware, takes dishes to the sink, and does worksheets everyday. And if she does everything all week (or most of it she is only 4) then she gets something from dollar store. I also made my own chore chart of daily chores and each day has a room that gets done and one load of laundry. You have helped me so much in keeping my house clean. I read your blog everyday and it inspires me. Thank you.
You totally speak my language! I have the same fears and procrastination with starting chores for my 4-year-old. In fact, I recently started making my own bed each day (trying to make that a habit) so I won't be a hypocrite when I start asking him to make his own bed. I'm glad you found a system that works.
I love simple chore charts! Glad you found something that is working for you!
This is a great reminder! I need to get back at it!! I would love it if you would link up to my Tuesday's Tips too at:http://couponomicstimuluspackage.blogspot.com/2010/03/being-disorganized-is-costing-me-big.html
BTW I love the idea of 10 boxes for $1, that's a great idea! I will be borrowing that if you don't mind! 😉
Nice ideas! Have you ever heard of MyJobChart.com? The problem I have had with chore charts in the past is always having to make new ones, and making them all nice and artsy, but with the online chart, you dont have to worry about stickers and white boards or anything, its all very easy.
Oh. My. Gosh. YOU ARE ME! I have this really cool magnetic dry erase chore chart on my fridge, and I always ALWAYS forget about it, forget to assign chores, forget to remind or to check, etc. UGH Yes I have a hard enough time remembering my own tasks, and double that for the kids. It's time that I get serious and implement it your way. I love the ten tasks for $1 idea. That WOULD get their motivation going, since they both have things they want to save up for. Thanks!
Love it. 🙂
Chore charts have failed for us in the past too mostly because I don’t follow-up on it enough after the first few weeks (or first few days). 🙂 And we tried weekly chore lists where the kiddos earned money, but if they missed a day, they lost motivation for the rest of the week. I like the ‘per task’ idea – never thought of that before! Gives them a chance to immediately get back on track if they slip up.
I also see the potential for less nagging from me. If they don’t do a chore, I don’t have to point it out to them and try to force them to do it – just a line through the box and I’ll do the chore that needs doing myself (or let them try again the next day). Seems like it wouldn’t take too long for them to get with the program, especially when they see their brother or sis earning more money than them – that will be a big motivating factor, I’m sure! Thanks for the great idea – going to give it a try next week. 🙂
So we started the chore chart last week, and so far so good!
Made a few changes, and as my kids are younger (age 6 and twins who are 5) their chores are a little simpler. I chose to give them 10 tasks a day, but they’re the same things I already harp on them to do all the time: AM: brush teeth; get dressed; put away PJs; make bed (which is really just put your pillow and blanket back on the bed if you kicked it off at night or slept on mom’s floor – but at least I’m not tripping on piles of blankets on my bedroom floor anymore!); and get lunch & backpack (when school starts up again); PM: put away coat & shoes; do homework; put lunch bag in kitchen & dirty dishes in sink; put on PJs and put dirty clothes in hamper; and brush teeth.
They can also earn several bonus points per day (at my discretion) by helping me out with extra chores and doing chores without being told. So far, it’s really caught on especially with the twins (one of them actually has started coming up to me asking “Mom, is there anything you need help with?” What the?! AWESOME.)
I had the chart laminated at a teacher supply store. I use a Vis-a-Vis marker to write on it so I can erase and reuse each week. At the end of the week, I add up their points and for each one they earn a penny, (so 75 points = 75 cents allowance, etc.). I write this amount in a subtotal section, and then when I have enough change to do so, I put this amount in their piggy banks and move it from “Subtotal” to a “Bank” section on the chart – that way they can easily see their piggy bank balance (without needing to dump all their money all over the floor and count it up all the time).
Also, they don’t need to carry their money with them to the store – they can make their purchase on credit. If they want to buy something, I’ll just let them buy it (as a separate purchase so they can learn about sales tax!) and then when we get home they count out from their piggy bank the amount shown on the receipt and pay me back.
They’re learning that each point/penny adds up, plus having my own chores listed on the chart has ended up having an unforeseen bonus – the kids were looking at all the stuff I had crossed off on my list and said “Mom, you did A LOT!” Umm, YEAH – thanks for noticing! 🙂
Wow, Melissa! Great job! And I love that your kids were impressed with your chores!
Thank YOU for the inspiration! Love your blog, and have been going back through the archives reading it all. 🙂