I’m working on the office this week. I decluttered the corner on Monday, cleared/organized my desk on Tuesday, was gone all day yesterday, and today is Thursday. I haven’t done anything in this room yet. I still may, but it’s not guaranteed since in a short while I’ll leave to pick up kids from school and then I’m rarely able to focus on one thing for any amount of time.
Have I failed? No.
I’m trying to look at the big picture. Last week, I maintained the neatness of the previous week when I had been cleaning like crazy for a party. This is a big deal for me. I was looking forward to this week being focused on making lots of progress on the decluttering. This house needs LOTS of decluttering. But I have to maintain the areas that are clean so that I keep moving forward. If I declutter the office but let the dining room, kitchen and living rooms drift back into a state of chaos, I won’t be moving forward. I’ve always lamented that I am not capable of having my entire house clean all at once.
So, today I cleaned house. Probably like normal people (not slobs) do. To me this means that I cleaned even though it wasn’t a total pigsty. The kitchen floor looked pretty good since I’ve been sweeping everyday. But I mopped it anyway. It had been two weeks, and I think normal people probably mop at least that often. I scrubbed down/disinfected the bathrooms, following the cleaning procedures I learned years ago working at a summer camp. They looked fine before, but they look (and smell) great now.
I’m looking at the big picture. I am in this for the long haul. For the rest of our lives. I want to change how we live, not just have a clean house to sit and relax in until it gets filthy again.
As for the small details, I’m amazed at how having areas clutter-free allows me to really clean. I just mopped the kitchen, rather than picking up clutter and sweeping up months worth of cheerios and hardened spaghetti that the dog missed. No shopping bags had been thrown in a corner to be dealt with “later.” No refrigerator magnets had been kicked under the cabinets to be picked up “later.”
This means that I am freed up to notice details. In the bathroom, I’ve known for months that there was a suspiciously pee-like stain on my shower curtain. I tried to ignore it. I would tell myself that there was no way that could be pee. When I cleaned the bathroom today, I wasn’t frantic. I just went in and started scrubbing away. Since I wasn’t frantic, I stopped and took the time to accept that it probably was a pee stain. With two little boys, anything is possible. So I took it down and washed it. This wasn’t difficult, but I always felt so overwhelmed by the sheer volume of tasks to be done on my frantic cleaning days, that the thought of removing, washing, and rehanging the shower curtain before someone rang the door completely terrified me.
So today I:
Made bed.
Emptied dishwasher.
Swept kitchen.
Swept kitchen again.
Mopped.
Cleaned 2 bathrooms. (Didn’t clean the master bath.)
Cleaned up daughter’s scary room (big task).
Checked all bathroom floors for clutter.
Checked all bathroom counters for clutter.
Just did my 5 minute walk-through and found – two pairs of socks, shoes scattered just in front of, not in, the shoe cabinet, a pair of underwear, two child chairs that are supposed to be in the playroom, the mop that I hadn’t put away after mopping, the chairs that I hadn’t replaced at the kitchen table after mopping, a cup that had been left in the dining room because my daughter needed a snack just at the precise moment when I was starting to mop the kitchen, and probably a few other things I can’t remember.
I’m finding that the 5 minute walk-throughs are extremely important. I cannot trust myself to notice clutter unless I purposefully look for it.
Sara says
New here! Found you from Money Saving Mom. I teared up so many times reading through your first several posts because, although cleaning is not really my area of weakness, I have those areas of weakness that create the same feelings of helplessness, so my heart broke for you. When it comes to cleaning,I think I'm probably (for the most part) one of the "normal" people (more-or-less). However, I honestly cannot remember the last time I mopped my kitchen floor (I have brown tile for a reason…oh, you're a germaphobe…hopefully that doesn't completely gross you out!) So I was actually sitting here thinking, wow, maybe I should do that more often. Yuck…I really hate mopping.
Nony the Slob says
Welcome, Sara! Your comment means SO much to me. During this process, I've come to realize that everyone has that area in life where they just feel helpless. Kind of makes you feel connected with people even though their struggles may be in different areas.
And you know, pre-blog, my kitchen pretty much never got mopped. A total germaphobe in denial of reality thing.
Sara says
Thanks for the kind words Noni! Have a great day!
Mary says
I can really relate to your comment about not wanting to clean around clutter.
Kristy K. James says
Sometimes just maintaining something is the biggest key in moving forward.
Courtney says
Hi! I found your website yesterday from one of FB’s recommended pages. I love it! I’ve started reading from the beginning. Since this began 4 1/2 years ago, I have alot of reading to do. I’m really excited to follow your progress so I don’t want to skip around. We are a cluttered family. If there’s a flat surface, it’s got stuff on it from long ago. We have a second couch in the living room (our living room is long) that is never sat in because it always has coats, backpacks, & other leavings from walking from the front door to wherever. Same for our dining room table. It’s in the middle of the house so you have to pass it to get anywhere beyond the living room. Every bedroom is a disaster, especially ours. It’s divided into two rooms (converted attic space) & the second room catches everything. And we have a basement. There’s a path but that’s about it. Now, I have pockets of organization. The kitchen cabinets are well-organized. The bathroom cabinet. My closets that hold clothes (except the tall one that has random bags & other things in the bottom. The drawers & shelves that hold clothes. If I had bookshelves to put books on, those would be organized. I always liked having my books neat. But, having large spaces clean & neat is too much. If it requires consistency, I can’t manage. I’ve read several blogs about keeping a neat house but they are all written by people who consider themselves neat freaks. I can’t relate to that. So, thank you for sharing your struggle.
I grew up in a cluttered home but it wasn’t too bad. Our garage was always packed to the max, tho. My mom’s mom was a clean freak & my mom couldn’t stand it. It was always so stressful for her. So, she went the opposite way. We were required to clean the common areas & our bedrooms every Sunday. When we all left home, her clutter turned into hoarding. She couldn’t throw anything away. We (us kids) didn’t really know how bad it was until she passed away & our dad wanted us to go through her closet. Anyway, I never wanted to be that bad & I’m not. My husband has a harder time getting rid of stuff than I do. He doesn’t think we’re too messy. He’s got a sister who really is the definition of slob. Since our house doesn’t look like hers, we must be ok. She also has 6 kids, homeschools, husband often works from home. Three of them are now in college so maybe things are different.
My struggle is that I work part-time as a preschool teacher & all the after school necessities fall on me because my husband works second shift & often works overtime. He’s home most mornings but he’s often so tired from work that it’s all he can do to take care of our youngest & get her to preschool before he goes to work. There’s something to do after school every day of the week. Trying to squeeze in a decent meal, homework, & a little pick-up here & there is rough. Trying to get 3 kids bathed with some regularity is rough. And then it starts all over the next day.
I like your idea of non-negotiables. I think that will help me alot. Even if they’re all done at night before bed, at least they’re done. Since I’m reading your blog during Christmas vacation, I think I’ll get through alot of it before school starts again & am hoping to implement several non-negotiables during that time. We’ll see how it goes. Thanks for listening.
Dana White says
Welcome, Courtney!
pamtx says
I started reading the blog from the beginning this summer and am still working my way through. This post hits home for me as I really do not notice clutter that’s been in the same place for a long time. I also see some things that need cleaned up, but I ignore when it would probably only take me 1 minute to clean up the glob of cat hair, or spilled cereal, etc. Last night, I did put away the curling iron I had left on the bathroom counter while getting ready for date night. It was too hot to put away immediately. But, when we got back from our evening out and I was in the bathroom getting ready for bed, I actually put it back in the drawer where it lives. I even put the eye make-up back in the drawer it goes in. So, no stray items on the counter this morning.
I guess I’m getting there slowly.