I love this message so much. It’s an excellent real-life example of how understanding the Container Concept is so helpful for those of us who see the value in cool stuff!
A friend from church just offered me a “moving box size tote” of crochet cotton (the tiny thread used to make doilies and lace table cloths).
I do crochet. I make things like afghans, scarfs, and hats. I’ve never done doilies and the like. Also, I am learning to knit. Even so, I don’t spend a lot of time doing either at this point in my life.
I desperately wanted to accept this large tote of fascinating yarn that would help me learn a new way to make beautiful things.
But I have one moving box size tote of yarn already. It fits nicely under the nightstand beside my bed.
Because I’ve been reading, watching, and listening to you for the last 8 months or so, I knew some things:
- The tote I have is my container.
- The space in my house that I can devote to yarn (under the nightstand) won’t accommodate another large tote.
- In my “right now life,” I don’t have time to learn a new style of crochet (no matter how desperately my “fantasy self” would love to try).
So, I turned down the nice lady’s generous offer (which was most likely part of her own decluttering efforts).
I did say I’d take a few rolls of yarn that I could experiment and learn with sometime (because my current container has room for it).
My house is a work in progress, as you can see from the top surface of my nightstand in the photo. But I’m learning how to make it better, and how not to make it worse, from your content.
I know you’ve been at this slob-blog business for a long time. I just wanted to let you know you’re still reaching new minds and hearts.
I read your book Giving God the Worst of Me. In fact it’s one of the books on the nightstand. I love it so much. Your message–about decluttering, and about finding God’s strength in your weakness–is so moving and relevant. Sometimes I wish we could have coffee and chat for real. Thank you for putting yourself out there. You are an immense blessing.
I love this message SO MUCH!!! Embracing limits is freeing and makes decisions so much easier. It’s not that she doesn’t see the beauty and value of the crochet thread, and it’s not even that she can’t take some of it, but she knows that bringing it ALL home isn’t an option if she wants to maintain the progress she’s made. There simply isn’t room for all of it.
I’m so excited to see my nightstand on your blog! And so honored that you found my little story worth sharing. Thanks so much, Dana, for all you do!
This is celebration worthy, Andrea! Cheers for YOU! And cheers for Dana and her methods. Truly a gift to humanity!
I love this! I totally relate to her. I have been watching/listening/reading your material for almost a year now and your approach has totally changed how I view my stuff. She is right, you are a blessing.
I love her solution!! She didn’t want to hurt the lady’s feelings by turning her down. I would be so sensitive to that— even if I had to declutter it later myself, I’d find it so hard to say no. But the compromise— “I’ll just take a few to learn with, but I can’t take the whole tote”— is SO doable! You’ve respected the friend’s kind intentions, while recognizing your own limits and not harming your mental “bandwidth”, as Dawn likes to say. Simply genius!! Thanks for sharing this story and inspiring me! 🤗💕
Linda Marlene says
I love reading people’s success stories! It is such an encouragement to me. I have two small tables exactly like Andrea‘s nightstand! I believe they are vintage typing tables with the small drawer and the slide-out tray. I love that she has a bag of Lindor chocolates to the left of her tote! That would totally be me!
Cathy Ogi says
I, too, have a box under my ‘somewhat like a nightstand’ in my bedroom. Boy, that in itself helped me to relate. Thank you.
Ann B says
I don’t think I could have resisted. I’d have probably taken it and added it to the stack of three or four twice as large totes/bins that I already have of crochet threads. Or maybe I would do a purge/switch after sorting what I would use (or what my fantasy self likes best) and removing what I won’t use (doubt I’ll ever find a pattern for) from my inherited threads.
My yarn/thread stash is more than enough for 6 or more prolific knitters or crocheters for a few years. My fantasy self was forgetting her age when she started collecting in the latter half of her fifth decade and on into her 6th. She stopped buying/accepting yarns and threads new or thrift store finds, finally.
I have a friend who kindly refuses to accept more yarn than her stash/one bin can already hold of yarns. She knits winter socks all year, but even she takes a break when the weather is such she can be outside more.
Lindsey in OK says
As the mother of 8 children I am often the recipient of large quantities of other people’s stuff. It’s a big part of how we’ve managed to feed, clothe, educate, and entertain this many children. In the past I’ve often felt obligated to try and use everything. Even if it meant saving it for a decade. Nowadays I’m still happy to take stuff off people’s hands but I only keep what we can use right now (or in the next six months in the case of baby clothes) and that I KNOW we will actually use. That’s usually about 10%. The rest goes straight into the back of my car and gets dropped off within a day or two at our favorite thrift store. No qualms or regrets whatsoever. This post does remind me that I have had some yarn from my aunt for way too long now and it needs to get out now 😂
Zannie Rose says
Good for you. A while back someone said she no longer used her paints and offered them to me. At first I was thrilled, but later realised I already had more paints than I will ever use plus I did not want her cast-offs and the energy that would come with them. Luckily it did not lead anywhere as now she has joine a local art group. If any one ever offers me anything again, I will remember to say ‘thanks, but no thanks.’