My former life.
That’s a great excuse, right?
I mean, I’ve done quite a few different things and had a blast doing all of them. WHAT IF at some point in the future I want to do them again???
Like, I used to be a teacher. I taught high school English for two years and then taught Jr. High Theatre for two years.
Then I had babies. And even though I loved teaching, I loved having babies more. (Not the actual having, but you know what I mean.)
And now, when someone asks if I plan to go back to teaching, I can rarely get a “No!” out fast enough.
I’m thankful to have the opportunity to work toward making this blogging/writing thing my job.
But still, even though I’ve known for several years that I likely won’t go back to teaching, I still had my college textbooks.
Not because I read Contemporary American Poetry for pleasure . . . but because of what they represent.
They are a picture (a heavy, space-taking picture) of who I once was.
An intellectual. An educator. A person whose job, education, even personality . . . could be explained in one word.
And unlike “blogger” or “e-book author” it was a word that didn’t cause the average person to nod slowly while their eyes glazed over from total confusion.
But the fact is . . . studying those textbooks and teaching those students were important factors in creating who I am today.
But they aren’t who I am today.
And they’re heavy.
So now they’re gone.
Wait. You mean I’m supposed to get rid of my very first college level biology textbook? The one that is now 15 years old and completely out of date? The one I haven’t even opened in at least a decade? Hmmm … now that’s something to ponder.
Your college level biology book is only 15 years old? Crap. Mine is over 30. You mean it’s completely out of date? Dang.
So I clearly remember going thru my mom’s college textbooks (circa late 1950’s) when I was younger and finding the statement ” there’s this stuff in cells we call DNA. We don’t know what it does but we think it might be important”. I remember laughing my butt off and thinking “sheesh — how old and out of date!!! — we are so much more advanced now.” Fast forward to my going thru pharmacy school and taking micro bio, biochem, organic chem, etc etc etc. And thinking I was hot stuff. (late 80’s) Now fast forward to my daughters intro biology course in high school — and there was stuff in her book that hadn’t even been discovered when I was studying it in college!!!! So there was me – how old and out of date!! My college textbooks are now gone. Besides if I ever want to look something up, there’s no way I’d be digging around in the basement trying to find those old mildewy tomes. I would just look it up on the internet! Which also didn’t exist when I was in college — how old and out of date I am. LOLOLOL
I held onto some microbiology and genetics books for a long time–I think they reminded me that I used to be “smart” or thought I was. If I ever do go back to finish college, I’m pretty sure it won’t be that again.
Accepting the “new normal” hits us in so many ways, doesn’t it? Sometimes it’s so hard to let go of something from the past that we enjoyed so much at the time. I used to decorate cakes. Now – we try to avoid excessive sugar and food coloring, I don’t have the stamina to do a whole cake, I seldom ever have reason to even decorate a cake, and I’m trying to simplify my cooking. So…..why do I still have my cake decorating stuff? You know, you’ve inspired me. I am going to try to talk myself into giving that stuff to someone who might actually use it! 🙂 Thanks, Nony!
Now I’m really depressed. I have cake decorating stuff too (and probably 50 cake pans). The last cake I decorated was about 20 years ago. I don’t eat grains or sugar. At most I need a muffin tin, a loaf pan, and a springform pan. No wonder my house is a complete disaster.
Don’t be depressed, Peg. You can do it! I am trying to learn to “lay aside weights” as the Bible says. It’s really quite freeing if we can just think about it as letting go of weights that drag us down and going forward “lighter” in life, so to speak. 🙂 Plus, if you can give it to someone who will really use, that adds an element of satisfaction. It’s a new way to think about things but, by God’s grace, it’s growing on me.
I grew up in a family that collects stuff for all three of the main clutter reasons: 1. “I might need that someday.” 2. “This is an important memory.” 3. “I don’t have time to deal with that right now.” Sigh. It’s been a journey, I’ll tell you. But, it does get better. And, for me, as I saw my cupboards and drawers becoming more orderly and some spaces “expanding” and found that it was easier to deal with things, it got exciting and made it easier. But, I still have a *long* way to go. LOL 🙂 Lots of room for improvement still! And a couple rooms that need to be re-done from time to time. 😉
<3 Dana and this site. And your thoughts are quite encouraging, thank you.
Thanks, Mary, for your positive comments. God bless.
Don’t be depressed! Yesterday I moved my mom into assisted living. As we sat in the car outside her home I took her hand and said “mom, this has been a great house — It was perfect for you 25 years ago and we have so many wonderful memories here. But now it doesn’t work for you anymore so it’s time to move on. It’s time for a new family to move in here and make new memories — let’s imagine new kids running and playing where your grandkids used to ” So we said a prayer and actually “thanked” the house for being such a wonderful home for so many years. And prayed a blessing for whoever the new owners will be. I know it helped me and I think it helped her to actually articulate out loud that it was something that had been great but that it was now time to let it go. I actually feel like this might help me as I declutter in my own home — It is not easy to let some of these things go — so take a moment and let yourself acknowledge that.
And my husband should get rid of his Electrical Engineering textbooks from his very first semester of college, before his life took a completely different direction and he got 3 and a half degrees in Criminal Justice?
Just this summer I got rid of all but my very favorite Theatre Arts and Communications textbooks. Haven’t weeded through my play collection yet. 5 years of teaching high school Theatre Arts and Speech and I can’t see myself going back to it for very many reasons, even when the kids are older. But it’s taken a long to to purge first my files and now my books, even with as often as we’ve moved.
I once saw this described as “getting rid of the phantoms in your life.” A phantom is something you once were, but aren’t any more. For me that was a classroom teacher. After reading that, years ago, I gathered up all of my classroom stuff, like bulletin board decorations, etc., and gave them to a beginning teacher. (I only saved things I thought I could use with my own children.) I told her that they were all hers. I didn’t care what she did to them: used them, gave them away, or threw them out, but I didn’t want them back. I heard later that she put up one of my bulletin boards and that made me smile! I can only imagine that this is a process we must go through many times in the course of our life.
I taught first grade for 12 years…. many years ago I always hoped to go back to teaching, but the circumstances of my life never allowed it. I still have half of a large storage unit full of boxes of teaching materials, bulletin boards, files, games, books, etc….. I would love to give it all to someone who would actually use it, but public schools have changed so much, I hesitated to donate it —- I would hate to see all my hard work and things made with love, thrown in a dumpster. I think I will advertise, perhaps for homeschoolers, to come take what they would like.
You might also want to give the items to a brand new teacher. My daughter spent a lot of her own money setting up her classroom that first year.
Perhaps a child care center could use your bulletin boards, games and decorations.
I’m so pleased you’re doing the 31 dy thing, again! hooray.
I used to be pretty. But that went away on its own.
Don’t think like that, aging does not take beauty away, it accentuates it 🙂
Thank you! I needed to hear that today.
I agree! I’m 63 now and when I look in the mirror I’m happy with what I see in a way I never was when I was younger.
I’ve grown accustomed to my face!
My husband had an entire collection of notes and texts from his undergrad degree in mechanical engineering, all the way back to the 101 classes. He’s now 44 and has a master’s degree in robotics, working in a completely different industry. It took a while — 18 years and five moves where we boxed and unboxed that stuff — but I convinced him that even if he ever had to refer to any of those basic concepts again (which I highly doubt), he could find it faster on the Internet. It took two entire 55-gallon trash bins to purge his collection. I also just purged my collection of clips (I’m a professional writer and editor) from my 16-year career. I don’t need two copies of every magazine or newspaper where my articles have appeared, and heck, I don’t even need to keep the whole magazine in most cases. So much of it is online now. I had a stack as tall as me, and I reduced it down to a leather portfolio, which I can easily take to an interview or career fair, and a couple of magazine holders. Boy, did that feel good!
It’s like you are narrating my brain… I used to insist to my husband that it looks cool when you lean a guitar that neither of us can play up against the wall. I finally got rid of most (not all) of my suits since my day-to-day is in pajamas more often than heels… or any other shoes. But no judging, right?
Good for you, Nony! I know it’s tough getting rid of books. I have a little bit of a different spin on this, in that we’ve homeschool for 25 years. I have always saved the oldest child’s curriculum to be passed down to the next one, and the next one, and the…..well, you get it. After my last child(almost 11 years ago) I determined to start removing curriculum from our home as soon as “the baby” was done with a grade level. It has not only brought in some extra money, but also freed up some much needed space.
Oooo. I understand completely. I am a homeschooling mom, but before that I was a mechanical engineer. It is hard to get rid of those books! I have gotten better about not seeing myself as a ‘title’, but it is hard!
Well, and what if I need those books someday …or I need to teach my children Calculus 4…no…just an excuse? I need to go purge some books!
Thanks for share Nony!
“But the fact is . . . studying those textbooks and teaching those students were important factors in creating who I am today.
But they aren’t who I am today.”
I haven’t commented in a long time, lots of excuses there, but:
I LOVE this statement. Those books did help create who I am today, but I don’t need them to Be who I am today! Great reminder.
We have been listening to the story of George Mueller, he was very extreme/convicted by God about not storing things here on earth. It makes me think about the reasons that I have all this stuff surrounding me. It is not glorifying to God and it can be better used by so many other people.
Good for you! Proud of you!
Thank you for this post Nony. I needed it. It is 13 years since I finished my accounting studies and I still have five impressive looking folders that sit not on a bookcase but in a box in the loft. I think I have kept them because they look impressive, because of the time commitment and achievement they represent and the what if I return to accounting and need to look something up.
Something my husband and I do to get rid of these overly long held things is ask each other to put them in the garbage or recycle bin when we decide it is time for the object to go but we can’t make ourselves do it.
I had such a hard time letting go of my textbooks. I loved how they looked all grouped together – screaming “look how smart she is” to anyone who looked.
But I did. 🙂
Why is that we have such a hard time letting go of the person that we used to be, I wonder? Even when we’re pretty happy as the person we are now. If one is miserable in the present I can see holding onto the past, but for those of us who are OK with our “now world” why the big stress over letting go of the past? It’s like we’re afraid if we lose connection with our past we will lose a piece of ourselves. But there’s a certain freedom of letting go of the past that can’t be found any other way.
Philippians 3:13-14 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.
I am finally realizing how silly it is to hang onto all those “mementos” and papers and accomplishments. Even when I have more time on my hands, I am not going to take time to peruse and enjoy any of that stuff.
Thanks for inspiring us all!
I still have my college books from years ago, medical textbooks that were EXPENSIVE and very hard to part with (also not worth anything because they come out with a new one every 1-2 years) and I have them, all of them, in a box…maybe my kids will be interested in reading them…someday?
I know I’m not helping matters, but I used to LOVE looking at my mom’s old nursing textbooks when I was growing up. But then, I’m a weirdo who really loves textbooks.
I was the same!
So, what,do you do with old textbooks that are way out of date? Is there an organization that will recycle them that you know? I need inspiration for other stuff too (not just textbooks!).
Hmmmm. I just donated them to my general donation place. I try not to get too caught up in finding the best place to donate certain things, since that could mean they stay in my house for longer.
Ugh, this is something I sometimes struggle with. I have one microbiology textbook I saved….and every year or two actually use!! The big one right now are all my Unix books. I stay home with the kids now, and the baby is 20 months, so I’m not going back to work any time soon. But What If something happened to my husband and I had to get a job? Being an admin is the highest paying job I could get to support my family (and, I really like the work). But it’s a lot of books. When I worked, I referenced said books daily! But now….it’s been 5 years since I’ve written a sed script, or set up a HACMP cluster, etc.
We just moved a few months ago, and I actually moved those books. I tossed out boxes and boxes of books (ok, took them to Half Price, but I came out with money and not new books!) but brought the admin books along. They’re in the basement right now (along with all other non-essentials, we’re in a rental for a while). Maybe one day I’ll be able to toss them.
I love this! In my big library clean out that I just completed I got rid of all my notes and textbooks from getting my masters in accounting. Tax law changes so frequently I would have to go back to school now to work again in that field and I have no desire to do so anyway, yet I still had everything from those classes thirteen and a half years after graduation! That was one of the harder section if things to get rid of, but it sure left a lot of space!
During college I amassed a ton of grades 6-12 language arts textbooks. Then I had babies and stayed home. During a declutter stage I got rid of the textbooks and later the workbooks. Now I am back in the classroom and thinking about all those books and again trying to collect resources. I just try to remember that digital resources take up much less space than those textbooks did.
You are so flippin funny and so right!
My husband refuses to get rid of his jr college math workbook, and that was almost 40 years ago. Refuses! Whereas 20 years ago I got rid of all my airline reservationist notes and documents. And they had tremendous sentimental value as well. Oh well, maybe someday.
I would love to get rid of my husband’s nursing textbooks from the 80’s. However, they are presently holding up an upper kitchen cupboard that would fall down if we moved them. Who wants a repairman in the house when it’s so messy? Now that the place is somewhat okay since a major Christmas clean maybe we need to get it done. Then we can throw out those textbooks.
I love this. I’m a mom of 3- a 4yr, 2yr, and new baby. My hunny works so I can be home and he constantly mentions all the junk I have. I’m currently at the crossroads trying to figure out who I am now. I’m no longer the marine biology student… Why can’t I let those last two marine invertebrate books go? How about my high school nic nac junk? What about all the junk still at my parents house? Sigh! You are surely inspiration to me!! Thankyou for your honesty!
Excellent, as always. I’ve got loads of ‘used to be’ stuff too.
I just got rid of my ” Whos Who” high school book. Thick heavy book that Ive never even cracked open in the last 30 years. I tore out my page and kept the cover. The rest of it gone. I couldn’t have done w/o a very harsh, strict I mean supportive friend.
I will probably tutor, free or not, young children who think differently. I had to get rid of my under grade English and Psych books years ago or friends said they would never move me again.
Sorting through the special needs stuff is about to become easier.
My sweet hubby and I were talking about this just this morning. We tend to hold onto things because they are memories. Not the object themselves, but the memories they bring when we look at them. When getting rid of “things” it feels like we are getting rid of our memories. Now of course that isn’t true, but we are working through that. Slowly and surely things are leaving.
But … The memories are triggered by the site of the objects. When the objects are gone, what will trigger the memories?
I think the answer is we are supposed to take pictures of these things. But then what do we do with the pictures? We have to organize them! Do we create a folder on our computer that says “open this for random memories”?
I probably shouldn’t admit this, but I’d like to get back to writing essays and maybe my life story in more detail, and I need my memories for that.
Don’t get me wrong. I need to declutter as bad as anybody and more than most. My life would be easier if I could sell my house right now but it is in no shape to sell with all the stuff in it. I’m 62 years old, a full-time student after having lost the job I had for 30 years, and I’m the primary emotional support and advocate for my ex, who has dementia and is in assisted living. I don’t have a lot of time for decluttering, but my life would be so much easier if I weren’t constantly putting stuff down and losing track of it in the mess.
Thank you, I needed to hear, “but they aren’t who I am today”…still on my way to finding out who that is tho!
This is a huge challenge for me because I do have things I plan to return to when my youngest is a few years older.
My big problem is that I often get proven right for saving stuff. About two years ago, I was all set to throw out all my textbooks and notes that I had saved from getting my masters’ degree as a librarian. But I was lazy and didn’t do it, and then a year later I was invited to come back to my library school as an adjunct professor, and some of those notes were a great refresher to build up part of the curriculum of my class. This has happened to me more than once, with different saved objects, texts, or paperwork So I get paralyzed by the possibility that I will need whatever it is five minutes after I get rid of it!
I just got rid of a meal replacement drink that has ben in me refrigerator since 2015! Yes, 2015! I actually packed it for breakfast one morning and when I saw the date on it I thought, I’m better than this.”. And so it begins. . .
I finally got rid of college textbooks and boxes of notes. From high school calculus! Why!
I did keep one textbook. I couldn’t bear to get rid of it and my las pass of the office left an entire shelf empty. I had a number of items that I was having a hard time getting rid of but didn’t want to store so they’re now displayed on that shelf with the text book adding a level change.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I have a masters in English, but I’m very happily a sahm, and I don’t see ever going back to anything that has to do with critical theory and literature. But I can strongly relate to those of you which have this same conundrum (esp the reminder that “I used to be smart!” Lol).
Time to work on purging. God bless you all. ❤️❤️❤️
And who said, “it’s like you’re narrating my brain!” Soul sisters here. 🥰
This is a hard one for me. I don’t think of myself of a sentimental person, but you’re asking me to get rid of the evidence of who I once was. OUCH!!!! I’ll think about that while I continue to work on the easy stuff.
Yes – ouch for me too! One day in my twilight years I might enjoy reminiscing about the different phases of my life, prompted by that evidence!🤔
“They’re heavy, and now they’re gone…”
I just can’t help thinkin’…….what an awesome way to lose weight.
With me, books in particular are hard, I was into making herbal medicines and I had all these cool books – most of which I didn’t even read at the time, let alone now. I kept my two favorites and donated the rest. Same with my counted cross-stitch pattern books (I got too nearsighted to cross-stitch, and once that was cleared up through cataract surgery I just never had the time to sit down with needle projects), so I kept two or three of the pattern books that could be useful (one a lettering pattern book and one I just genuinely had loved the patterns from) and donated the rest specfically to people I knew would use them. Now I still have “who I used to be” on about 2 inches of shelf space rather than two SHELVES, with more room for who I am NOW.
Wow… this post originally came out 10 years ago! And it’s still so relevant.
And this bit of wisdom hit home:
“…were important factors in creating who I am today.
But they aren’t who I am today.
And they’re heavy.”
I know you were talking about the physical weight of the books, but I feel the emotional weight of the things that helped create me who I am, the things that I’m holding on to because I used to…, and those things are so heavy.
I bookmarked this blog post a few years ago and continue to read it whenever I’m working to declutter boxes of “memorabilia” as we like to label them. I recently went through some things from my high school days (which included a pair of sock and a bundle of hair ribbons from the pom squad days….yes, and old pair of socks). I let my daughter claim a few things that are now considered vintage (sigh) and the rest went into the donatable donate box. I’m so not that girl anymore and won’t be her ever again, so i will keep the memories and not the stuff.
I had no problem letting go of my college textbooks and notes. All I had to do was look at my diploma on the wall. I still stop sometimes and look at it and remember all the friends, good times and work that went into that piece of paper.
I finally got rid of my nursing books….the ones printed before HIV. Freed up 3 shelves!
I can relate to this so much. I wasn’t a teacher but I was a very passionate straight-A student all my student life. A lit major. And I still have all my textbooks. My first lame excuse is because they cost me all a fortune, especially when I was a broke student. But the other reason is like you said, because of what they represent. I will have a hard time getting rid of them, but I know I have to. I know I won’t re re-reading them!