I really liked the checklist that I created last week.
First let me make my excuses. I made the chart to start with Sunday. But I made it on Sunday, and then started using it on Monday, not paying any attention to how I had made the chart (even though I made it less than 24 hrs before).
You can see on the chart that I did well on Monday and Tuesday. I enjoyed checking things off and realized how minimal the list really is . . . on a day when I’m home and totally focused on getting things checked off.
The third day, when there are only a few checks, was Wed, the day I’m gone most of the day. Thursday was better, and then Friday hit and the kids were off of school, so all routine went out the window.
Yes, there are more unchecked than checked, but I’m going to look at the checked boxes and be happy.
So now for my new non-negotiable task for the week. It’s an ultra-basic one. It’s one that would make normal people say “Huh?” It’s one that will make my husband happy.
Whenever the question comes up about whether there is something that you would change about your spouse, this thing is what he says .
Ready?
I’m going to close the kitchen cabinet doors and my dresser drawers.
It drives my husband crazy that I almost never close a cabinet door. Really. It’s like he’s living in Sixth Sense.
It is not unusual for him to enter the kitchen to find EVERY SINGLE cabinet door and drawer open.
Now, this is NOT a conscious decision. It honestly never occurs to me that I left the cabinet door open. So I’m not kidding myself that I’m going to completely change this week. But I’m putting it on my check list, and so at one certain point in time during the day, all the kitchen cabinets and my dresser drawers will be closed.
If hubby’s not home at that certain point in time . . . tough.
This seems like a very trivial thing, but it’s along the same lines as when I made the non-negotiable to check the bathroom floors for clutter. Doing this consciously, once a day, helped me to change my focus. It helped me see the things on the floor that I didn’t naturally see.
And I’ve already added it to the list, and printed the chart for the week. We’ll see what happens.
If you need an incentive, remember that there is no need to heat (or air condition) the inside of your cabinets, drawers, and closets. Do it for your husband, do it for your utility bills!
I've got to make a checklist!
Once again, you are expressing me, and my leaving all the doors and drawers open. I truly understand!! HA HA HA
My hubby also says I leave a trail of shoes and clothes from the front door to the bedroom. Oh well, he knew about it b4 we were married(lived together 4 years b4 our first child together) so deal with it buddy!!!
He actually does, he is the great finder of all lost things.
You're so cute! My husband is the cabinet-door-left-open culprit in my house and it is kinda annoying (especially when I bump my head on said cabinet), so I think it's awesome that you're adding this to your list.
In looking at your checklist, I'm realizing I should probably do this. Your example has really helped me get back on track. When I don't feel like doing something, I tell myself, "MJ, this is what it means to be a grown up. Get up and make your kids' lunches (or whatever it is)." And then I do it. Grumbling at myself the whole way, but I do it. It's amazing how much these non-negotiables have become the gateway to order (or chaos) in my life. The kitchen sink must be shined before I go to bed. Period. The balance of my house somehow rests on it. Thank you for writing this blog — I'm so glad I found it!
*giggle* You would drive my 4 year old NUTS! She's very particular about everything being closed!
I have a similar chore chart for myself (though you get much more done in a day than I do) and I love seeing the checkmarks. I just found your blog (via Tackle it Tuesday I think) and became a follower because I too am a slob who's trying to get organized.
LOL I am the same way! Hubby always tells me to shut all the drawers/doors and you think I would after I bang my head onto them 500 times. And my 16 month old shuts everything (that he is able) behind me – the dishwasher, cabnits, doors, anything! It's so cute.
My husband is the same way, but our kitchen is rather narrow so we really need to shut the cabinets and definitely the drawers! The kids never do and it drives my husband MAD! Yet he never shuts his own closet door?!?! I just think it looks a lot nicer when they are closed.
Ok – I just had to comment again. This was actually my husband's problem rather than mine. He never closed a cabinet door, nor even the dishwasher, which for a short person like me, is right at shin level. Drove me batty. This was before we got married & try as I might, I could never "help" him with this bad habit. Finally, we were within weeks of getting married & I realized, my cats would accomplish what I couldn't. And indeed they did. Within a little while of moving in together after the wedding, he came home to find a cat curled up on the plates. He's been closing cabinet doors every since!
Lisa in Hixson
I, too, have a husband who leaves every cabinet door hanging open. It looks like the kitchen is trying to fly away. In the past I was so irritated by this. I'd think, "SERIOUSLY?? You can't close the cabinet door??" I actually took it a bit personally, wondering why he thought it was my job to close cabinet doors. Your blog has helped me realize that his cabinet door issue is no different than my pile of folded laundry issue, or my walk past that glass on the table on my way to the kitchen 15 times issue, or any of my other issues. So in addition to making me laugh, you've helped me to feel more positive toward my wonderful hubby of 20 years! Yea you.
Just found this blog and it is great! I also have a husband who does not "get" the cabinet-and-drawer-closing idea. What kills me is that he closes them PART of the way — I mean he actually makes the effort to push the door or drawer in a little bit, and then stops! Why? Why?? If you're going to do that, just close it all the way! But I'm trying to overcome my frustration with this like Anonymous above, and find some humor in it as I concentrate on my own issues instead of his. If closing the doors and drawers is so easy for me, why not just do it myself if he won't?
I was thinking about your blog today as I swept, and I realized along with this post that part of my slobbitude is the idea that they are things that have to be done and things that are optional. Sort of the glory parts of even the less glamorous tasks. So cutting my roses just involves cutting my roses, and I count the task done even though the tools aren't put away, and the walkway and garden are littered with the cuttings.
Shutting doors and drawers was like that for me, I was in such a rush to do what I thought was the "main thing" like getting a spoon to a cranky child, that I'd leave the drawer open. When my kids starting banging into them, and I'd feel bad, I'd remember to close them, and then I discovered that it really did bother me to come into the kitchen and find everything open-I didn't know that was part of the reason I was grouchy until I went in and everything was nice and I feel myself relax.
I have been browsing your blog for a day now, nodding and laughing aloud because I can totally relate to you in SO MANY WAYS. Then, I see this bit about the drawers. I DO THAT TOO! My husband is always on my case about it and says things like "WHY DONT YOU JUST CLOSE IT?" and I don't have an answer. I showed him this post, and he cracked the biggest smile and just laughed his butt off. I am so excited to start this journey, and it really helps to see that I am not alone, and there are people like me
Wow! What is it that makes us do all these things. I have really had to make an effort to LEARN to close cabinet doors…and I looked just now and my pantry and one cupboard is open, even though I feel like I’ve gotten MUCH better about it. And that’s not counting the pots and pans cupboard that can’t close because it’s cluttered and the kids’ dishes cupboard that’s a bit screwy now because, well, it’s their cupboard and I encourage them to get their own dishes…I really need to check and see what they did to the door that it doesn’t hang properly now.
And I use the excuse that my dresser is a BEAST and it requires both hands and quite a bit of ooomph and positioning to get my drawers to close. But really just means I need to break down and buy a new one. This one was a blessing 6 years ago after a housefire, but it’s time to move on and get one I don’t hate and that doesn’t make it so difficult to keep my room in order.
Ok…you totally lost me hear. I can look at food on the floor under the kitchen table, think that I should probably clean it up, and then leave it there for another week. I am totally guilty for doing the sniff test on my kids’ school uniforms. I couldn’t tell you the last time any of my bathrooms had a thorough scrubbing. But…I’m with your husband on this one, leaving the doors/drawers open would drive me crazy. That and my 4 year-old would totally lose it. There are many times I get something out of the pantry and leave the door open because I’m going to put it right back. By the time I turn around he usually has the door closed already 🙂
Maybe there is hope for me yet!!
Just found your blog, and….WOW! It’s like reading about myself! I am a total disaster when it comes to householding, budgets, clutter etc. I also have a diagnose of Bipolar, wich isn’t helping much in that area. 😉
I have a tip for those of you that, like me, can’t seem to handle checklists. I have tried over and over to have checklists for everything that needs to be done. Writing them down is fine, but checking them of? Eehh, no. It seems like adding that cross to clear of the task, add clutter to my brain. That makes any sense to you? Anyway. I found something at pinterest that totally worked for me.
I have to white papers, basic printer paper works fine. One marked “today” and one marked “later”.
Then I write down things I need to do on post-its and put them on the papers, daily stuff on “today”, projects and somedays on the “later”. Then, when I finish a chore, I throw that post-it away. Hopefully, on the end of the day, I have a totally blank paper.
It becomes a challenge to have that paper empty, and it frees the clutter in my head. 🙂
So, with that said…. I think I’ll have to start my own blog…. And I’m so going to buy your books (when my salary drops in on Friday, too many days left of the money this month)
Great idea!
I know this is an old post, but I just found your blog and I’m doing as commanded and reading it backward ;-). This post made me laugh at myself. I am always walking into the kitchen and grumbling about the cabinet doors being open. Well not more than am hour ago one of my children came in complaining that there was nothing to do outside. I left my laundry to get some bubbles from the kitchen. The bubbles were in one of the high up cabinets that can’t be reached without a stool. I got the bubbles and went back to my laundry. I came back to the kitchen a few minutes later to find the doors that cabinet wide open! Sadly there was only one possible culprit. Me! I had been doing it all along and didn’t even realize it! Ugh! Thank you for having the guts to put your comming clean proses in a blog! I find that as I read (backward) that my thinking is slowly changing!
Ha! It’s SUCH a hot-button issue in so many families. And I’m so glad you found my blog!
I do the same thing with doors and drawers! It too, drives my husband crazy! It must be something with those of us who are housework challenged. Too funny! Love your blog. It’s so inspiring. I was also a FlyLady drop out, but doing just the really simple things is working for me! I am reading from the start and can’t wait to catch up. It’s giving me so much hope.
My husband *HATES* an open cabinet/drawer/closet door. I blame him for my non-closing habit. (excuses, I got plenty). I was never aware of whether or not I closed drawers and cabinets before hubby and I lived in a house with cabinets that actually had doors on them…. but I don’t close them. I don’t see them. For years we lived in places with kitchens/rooms that had unfinished cabinets. There were no doors to close! Now we’re in a house with more cabinets and built in dressers and odd closets than I imagined was possible to put in a house. Every evening I hear it. Slam. Slam. SlamSlamSlam. Then, from the kitchen, bathroom, closet under the stairs, wherever he found a random opened drawer/door/cabinet, comes his voice “I closed all the cabinets!” I need to work on this I suppose. BUT!! I just looked into my own kitchen as I posted this, and All My Cabinets Are Closed. And I’ve been in most of them already this morning. Go Me! And go you too ;).
I think I read this post early on, before I started at the beginning. I included “close all kitchen cabinets and drawers” on my first week’s non-negotiable list. I’m still on my first week but this one has been great. I find myself now noticing more often when they’re open, which is often, and it takes so little time to close them. It really helps my kitchen look better. A couple of times I’ve even caught myself only partly closing a drawer and I go back to give it a further shove.
Just discovered your podcast today and I’m hooked. It’s like I’m listening to my own life. Shutting the cupboard doors and drawers is HUGE for me…it makes my husband absolutely insane. Hopefully I can start working on some of these daily checklists and he won’t be so stressed 🙂
I’m the worst with the cabinet doors! Drawers I close because we have limited floor space and I worry about kids climbing up them, but hanging cabinets doors are invisible to me.
It so makes a difference in the look of the kitchen though! I will be working on this as a habit too!
I started reading your blog several years ago, and now that I have a two-year-old I’m going back through to get some additional tips for this phase of my life. I have to say I cracked up when I envisioned your husband living out that scene from The Sixth Sense! I had never had this issue until recently, but now I catch myself leaving cabinets open all the time! Mommy brain?
Open shelving in the kitchen is the trend right now. This would be a good solution for those who tend to leave cabinet doors open.
Hahaha, my husband has that problem. And he’s had it for decades! It annoys me so much, as it doesn’t matter how clean/nice/tidy a room is: If cabinets and drawers are open, it looks messy.