REALLY scary.
This is not a post about some big success. I didn’t even take a before picture. I might take a half-way through picture and say it was before. That’s how bad it is.
I feel so bad about the example I’ve been to my children. Why in the world should they keep their room nice if mine looks the way it does?
After visiting his cousins last summer, my 7yo casually commented, “You know, they keep their house a lot neater than we do.”
YES, I DO know, thank you very much.
That comment is probably one of the things that got me going on this process. I don’t want my kids to think, “Oh, well, there’s nothing we can do.”
But I’ve cleaned their room before. Many times.
I’ve thrown away things while they were at school, and they’ve never missed them. They were just so excited to have a neat room when they got home. And then, within a few days, the disaster is back.
But I have learned something from cleaning my daughter’s room a few weeks ago. It hasn’t stayed consistently picked up by any means, but it hasn’t hit disaster-status. When I did her room, I tried to make some real changes. I took out everything that was not something she used on a regular basis, including the tubs of clothes I had been storing in her closet since she was an infant.
So now, everything in her room has a place. This means that when we do pick it up, no decisions have to be made about where to put things. There’s a basket for doll clothes and accessories. There’s a tub in the closet for costumes. There’s a shelf for the big dollhouses and Barbie Car. There’s a shelf for books. Stuffed animals go on the bed, and everything else goes in the toy box.
This is what I want to do with the boys’ room. Find a place for everything. It’s just that I get so overwhelmed.
When I cleaned up their room a while back, I had the great idea to move all of their camping clothes out of the dresser in their closet and into a bag since they only use those things when they go camping. Then I put a few of their things in that dresser.
The next time I remembered that those things were in there? Today when I opened the drawers.
This was partly because I had others of those same things in different drawers, so I never thought about there being MORE somewhere else. See, a place for everything is what we need. Not 16 different random places for anything.
I’m thinking about using the top drawer of that dresser for socks and underwear.
Here’s a big secret. Since underwear and socks cover more sizes than other types of clothing, like 6-8, my boys just grab a pair. I know, it’s a little gross, but they’re boys, they’re brothers, and the undies are clean. If you think about it, the younger has always gotten hand-me-down undies anyway from the older, so now at least it’s fair for everyone. I figure since I’m always saying “Look in your brother’s drawer!” when asked about undies, we might as well make it official.
The bottom drawer is going to be for sports/seasonal items like cleats and baseball pants.
Not sure what to do with the middle drawer.
I’m hoping that freeing up the socks/undies drawer in each of their sets of drawers will give enough room to get all of their clothes put away nicely.
Sorry for the randomness of thought in this post. I am labeling it as progress, since it is. I have to focus on progress rather than completion sometimes, so I can have the energy to keep going.
Doing this with my girls… they both can wear 3t-4/5kids… deciding to mash it together… granted the jeans only fit specific kids my my 5 year old knows whose is whose lol
“I am labeling it as progress, since it is. I have to focus on progress rather than completion sometimes, so I can have the energy to keep going.” By far, this is my favorite quote thus far.
I agree! I should print it off and post it somewhere to help me to keep trying.
Not too long ago, one the neighbour kids came to the door to see if our kids wanted to play, just stepped into the mudroom and asked “Doesn’t your mom clean?”
Ouch. Just ouch.
The underwear thing was a big question for me because my boys are just one year apart. I bought two different brands for years and then finally decided that since they get sanitized every time they are worn it was not that big of a deal. Especially since boy #3 is catching up in size very quickly. =)
I have done the same with my boys. They share all clothes. With the minor exception that the 5yo gets sent back to change pants if he grabs the 4yo’s pants. Sometimes. Hey, it ain’t 3″ of my my (mismatched) socks showing. I have enough to think about just washing and hanging the clothes the 4 kids generate. I’m trying to streamline before #5 arrives so the excrement doesn’t hit the oscillator for 6 months like it did with all the others.
The boys and my husband have designated wastebaskets for socks. All socks get washed in lingerie bags. Then hubs gets a sack of clean socks and the boys get a sack of clean socks and happy mama isn’t sorting out 4762.4 white socks every week. I think it took me 13 seconds this week to put the boys’ socks away.
Hi Dana, (I’m still reading your blog backwards) I was just wondering what you did, at the time you wrote this, with your youngest? I realize she is much older and in school now, but at the time, when you took on a big project like cleaning one of the kids’ room from disaster status, what did you do with your little girl? Was she in preschool? This is one of the biggest things I struggle with. We moved about 2 years ago, and every room in the house needs to be painted. However, the previous owners were terrible painters, and there are paint drips all over the walls. So, the OCD in me requires that every room be sanded down smooth first. ANYWAY, obviously a HUGE project that takes a long time. So, when I take something on like this, what little I was doing in the rest of the house fails. My youngest is 2 1/2, and will play reasonably well on her own, but I feel like I’m ignoring her if I try and work at any other time than just during her nap time. So, that causes pretty much any project I take on to drag on for MONTHS. And the rest of the house is a disaster. Just curious if your littlest was in preschool at the time, giving you more time to work or just how you handled that. Thank you!
I didn’t put my kids in preschool. They were home full time until kindergarten. Painting is hard, because the mess doesn’t allow breaks! I don’t think I painted with my kids around until they were at least potty-trained. But for decluttering, I just worked while she played. I could probably write a lot about my parenting philosophies, but I was/am fine with being there and available, but not needing to be playing with my kids at all times. I see great value in independent play, and also in them seeing me work in the house. Does that answer your question at all?
Yes, actually that does help a lot! I always have this “Mommy guilt” that I should be playing with my kids more, but it is so good for them to learn to play by themselves, and, like you said, to see me work in the house. Still trying to figure this all out but it is so good to know how other people manage it! Thank you!